


And Justice For All

by a_mere_trifle



Series: Pantheon [2]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: AU, Future Fic, Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2011-02-18
Updated: 2012-01-11
Packaged: 2017-10-15 18:25:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 28,880
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/163616
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/a_mere_trifle/pseuds/a_mere_trifle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Vriska isn't going to escape the consequences of her latest betrayal. Terezi is going to make sure of that. With the coolkid and the weight of millennia of legislaceratorial tradition behind her, she cannot possibly fail.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know how good this is-- I rarely write trolls, and there's a pretty good reason for that-- but I've got to post this monster before if gets jossed five more times! (Want to wager it's being contradicted by canon even as I type? XD)
> 
> The markup on this. Ohmygod. @_@
> 
> Additionally: the stories in this series aren't really meant to be compatible, or to take place in the same universe. You could probably find a way to manage it if you tilted your head to the side and thought too hard, but it'd involve several unreliable narrators, and it would make it even more depressing, so... try it at your own risk? XD

-*-

 _this world is a cold one  
the evil and bold ones  
betray all their oaths and  
escape to the dark.  
their own fires burn them  
if they don't abjure them  
they'll find that they're left with  
a permanent mark._  
- _A Poem Extolling the Many Virtues of the Legislacerators, Particularly Their Dogged And Determined Nature And Their Passion For Avenging Crimes_ , unknown/Traditional

-*-

You could call Vriska many things, and oh yes, they'd all been tried; but not even the most ardent kismesis could deny that she was good at what she did.

Exactly what the fuck it was she did, Terezi had never been sure. It'd seemed reasonable at first, natural troll behavior, but as time wore on, her goals had become more and more hazy-- haphazard, even, cobbled-together. Terezi blamed that twisted bitch of a lusus, but that hardly mattered anymore. It was far too late for redemption.

And by the time Terezi finally saw through scheme and counterscheme and wild distraction, well-- it was far too late for that, too.

Her blood cried for justice within her, said that Vriska had evaded it for far too long, and fuck yes, she agreed; but she'd been boxed neatly into a corner and time wasn't on her side. She'd figured it out too late; there was only one thing she could even try to do.

She booted up Trollian, tapping her fingers impatiently as it burrowed through proxy after proxy, evading Sollux's firewalls and Vriska's monitoring. Finally, the connection was clear and secure, even if it was probably too late.

Maybe he'd still listen to her, maybe he wouldn't, maybe it wouldn't help if he did; but justice demanded she try.

COOLK1D, she typed.

RUN.

NOW.

If anyone in the world could manage it, it would be him.

\--

Terezi was surprised, for a moment, that she'd been left alive, before she remembered that Vriska had always been overconfident that way. She'd want her as a pet, to keep around and laugh at, to watch like a fish in a bowl as it uselessly, prettily schemed against you. Vriska was okay with having people to rule over, unlike other lusus-fucking bulgelickers she could name. She took pleasure in at least fucking with you before you died. Terezi wasn't really sure, on the whole, which was worse.

Her throat hurt like hell, her teeth were seared to nubs; the rules that always brought them back before were broken and death had a bitterer taste. She'd tried to take her voice, Vriska had, and she might've succeeded. So what did that leave her with?

There was a buzz beside her-- she'd been left with her new phone, too, how merciful. She flipped open the still-unfamiliar lid, pressed the tip of her tongue to the screen-- and tasted cherry and iron and ash, jolting straight through her spine, jerking her away before she could even try to discern the words.

It had worked? If something had gone right, it would be the first time in weeks-- had it not even been weeks since this bullshit began? Or had it been happening her whole life?

But that was philosophy, and Terezi believed in the practical. She pressed her lips to the screen again, closing her eyes to concentrate even if that made no physical sense anymore.

TG: so i never talked with all of you  
TG: and theres something i need to know  
TG: it seems like theres a couple of you who arent total fucking wastes of space  
TG: and you should probably give me a list  
TG: of anyone you dont wanna see dead  
TG: which maybe ill pay attention to i dont know  
TG: but know this for fucking sure  
TG: i am killing her  
TG: and that harry potter douche  
TG: and that juggalo freak  
TG: and anyone who stands in my way  
TG: you like justice  
TG: make sure the wrong people dont stand in my way  
TG: giant robot catch you later   
\--turntechGodhead has disconnected--

Well. Maybe there were a couple of miracles left, after all.

\--

There was a human conceit called "mercy". It was a confusing concept, and Terezi wanted no part of it. He'd come after her, too; he had no reason not to. And while she would defend herself to the best of her ability, she was really okay with however that contest might turn out. Risking death was part of a legislacerator's job description. Actually, fuck that; risking death was part of being born a troll.

Still, from the way he talked... he might actually be buying into the stupid idea. Maybe it was just a game, cat-and-mouse, bait-and-switch, but... damn it, it was so hard to remember sometimes that these people were aliens, and they didn't think like normal people at all.

Well, it didn't matter. Whether it was a game or it was one of the few sincere things the coolkid had ever said to her, it called for the same response.

GC: 1 4M GO1NG TO DO TH1S PROP3RLY, COOLK1D.  
GC: FULL COURTROOM R3G4L14. DU3 PROC3SS.  
GC: 1 4M NOT US3D TO TH1S TYP3 OF D3F3NS3, BUT 3V3N TH3 MOST 4V1D L3G1SL4C3R4TOR S3L3CTS H3R WRONGDO3RS PR3C1S3LY.  
GC: B3S1D3S, YOU'R3 GO1NG TO B3 V3RY BUSY. L3T'S B3 3FF1C13NT.  
GC: YOUR HONOR4BL3 TYR4NNY, TH3 F1RST WHOM 1 PR3S3NT TO TH3 COURT 4S NOT QU1T3 WORTHY OF YOUR T1M3 1S...  
GC: K4RK4T V4NT4S.   
TG: who the fuck is that  
TG: and "your honorable tyrrany" what the fuck  
TG: you people really call judges that   
GC: YOU DON'T?  
GC: 1 4SSUM3D TH4T'S WH4T "YOUR HONOR" W4S SHORT FOR.  
GC: THOUGH NO LEG1SL4C3R4TOR WOULD D4R3 SHOW SUCH 1MPUD3NC3 TO TH3 PR3S1D1NG JUDG3.   
TG: let me guess  
TG: or they eat you   
GC: *G4SP*!!  
GC: HOW D1D YOU KNOW??   
TG: think im kinda getting a grip on troll society  
TG: everything in the whole fucking world will kill you  
TG: getting more of an idea of what that shit must be like   
GC: 4NYW4Y, K4RK4T W4S OUR L34D3R.  
GC: TH3 GR4Y-T3XT ON3? W1TH TH3 S1CKL3 4ND TH3 CH3RRY-R3D BLOOD?   
TG: oh yeah that douchebag  
TG: he was okay  
TG: is he with the hellbitch   
GC: H3LL NO.  
GC: SH3 H4S T4K3N H1S POS1T1ON 4S L34D3R. H3 FUCK1NG H4T3S H3R.  
GC: TH4T 4ND SH3 K1LL3D H1S HUM4N R3DROM 1NT3R3ST. H3 COULD WR1T3 4N EP1C BL4CK ROM4NC3.  
GC: 4ND WOULD, BUT SH3 TH1NKS H3'S B3N34TH H3R.   
TG: i dont know what the fuck a black romance is  
TG: and dont fucking tell me  
TG: cause i remember "karkat" tried to once   
GC: H3 DO3S LOV3 TO D1SP3NS3 ROM4NT1C 4DV1C3.   
TG: and ive been dealing with time loops living four days in one  
TG: and i still dont know what the fuck he meant  
TG: and i dont care its all batshit insane  
TG: wait what the fuck is redrom  
TG: DONT TELL ME  
TG: DONT TELL ME  
TG: CHRIST DO I NOT CARE   
GC: 4LL R1GHT, F1N3, R3M41N UN3NL1GHT3N3D.  
GC: NO SK1N OFF MY HORNS.  
GC: BUT 1F 1T H3LPS...  
GC: H3 D1D H1S B3ST.   
TG: it wasnt much   
GC: TRU3.   
TG: couldnt feel so i tried to touch  
TG: told the truth i didnt come to fool you  
TG: fuck im tired   
GC: NOT H3R3 TO FOOL M3? NOW TH3R3'S 4 STR4NG3 CONC3PT.   
TG: and even though it all went wrong  
TG: ill stand before the lord of song  
TG: with nothing on my tongue but  
TG: fuck this bullshit  
TG: car cat huh  
TG: hes kind of a douche  
TG: but if i were killing the douchebags id have to stab myself before i got too far   
GC: 3R1D4N F1RST, THOUGH, SUR3LY.   
TG: fuck yeah i dont hate myself that much  
TG: me and harry potter get in a douche-off i aint lasting ten seconds  
TG: nose to the fucking mat double douche suplex im tapping out  
TG: no man born can beat the prince   
GC: STOP TH4T, YOU'LL G1V3 H1M 4 SW3LL3D H34D.   
TG: heh   
GC: YOU PROB4BLY 4CTU4LLY WOULD. H3 1S TH4T K1ND OF FUCK1NG MORON.  
GC: fuck yes im the best evver dont you fuckin forget it  
GC: im lonely come entertain me you lowwblood fuckwwits  
GC: TH3R3 4R3 F3W CR1M1N4LS WHOS3 D34TH 1 WOULD R4L1SH S331NG MOR3 TH4N H1S.   
TG: a troll among trolls damn  
TG: anyway g2g  
TG: weapons deal   
GC: OOH, N4M3 ON3 4FT3R M3.  
GC: >:]   
TG: sure whatever   
\--turntechGodhead has disconnected--

They felt like lyrics to her, and the search confirmed it. She sat there and listened for a while, listening to the strange slow style, the almost religious tone, trying idly to understand what it must be like to think that way. The feelings seemed muted, and yet-- everything about their world had so much color, and she'd known fire in the coolkid, eager silliness, at least, in that silly grub friend of his. Maybe it wasn't quite a difference of feeling. Maybe it was just that all the stakes were different, wildly different, and those differing priorities left almost nothing the same.

Maybe it was a miracle they could talk to each other at all.

Of course, none of them liked the word "miracle" anymore... and there was the whole issue of the takeover/minor genocide to consider.

"Better", "Worse"-- Terezi didn't care about those things, not really. The only abstract she cared about was justice, and on a practical scale-- well. They'd failed. The kids had succeeded. And managed a much lower death rate, even with alternate timelines and that one kid dying at least twice.

No, they'd lost all rights to this world a long time ago, by every written and unwritten law even Alternia had.

And this was the last law Vriska was going to break.

\--

Karkat hobbled into the room, grumpy as always, but she ignored him; there was a message on her phone.

"WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU EVEN CALLING?" said Karkat, arms folded, glaring at her.

"NOW 1'M C4LL1NG YOU, SW33TH34RT," she sent, a grin spreading across her face.

"HILARIOUS," he muttered. "I'M STANDING RIGHT HERE, YOU KNOW."

"1'V3 GOT 4 SL1T THRO4T, YOU KNOW," she shot back, and flipped back to the other window for a moment.

TG: got a sweet new weapon by the way  
TG: finally outclassing those fucking doombots  
TG: who the fuck designed those anyway  
TG: i should probably kill them too   
GC: 1S 1T 4NOTH3R SH1TTY BROK3N SWORD?

"PLEASE. LIKE IT'S REALLY STILL THAT BAD." He paused. "...IS IT?"

"Juzzt 4 b1t," she rasped, and swallowed hard against the pain. She was fully capable of exaggerating such infirmities, and fully intended to, but she couldn't yet-- she could still barely croak, and that once or twice a day.

"...OH. WELL. OKAY THEN." He looked down. "I GUESS YOU CAN KEEP PESTERING ME THEN."

"HOW GR4C1OUS," she typed, and flipped to the other screen.

TG: fuck no it is awesome  
TG: besides there was nothing shitty about my broken swords   
GC: EXC3PT TH31R B31NG BROK3N?   
TG: that just made them better man  
TG: maybe its too deep for your troll brain to understand

"...HE'S STILL DOING IT," said Karkat, and it only took her a second to understand what he didn't want to say.

"H3 W4S 4LW4YS K1ND OF 4N 1D1OT TH4T W4Y," she answered.

"...I TRIED TELLING HIM," he said, staring out the window.

GC: WH4T? W3 S41D W3 WOULDN'T.

"I KNOW, I KNOW, I JUST-- JEGUS FUCK, YOU'VE SEEN IT. IT'S FUCKING INTOLERABLE, WHAT SHE'S DOING TO HIM. SO YOU KNOW WHAT? FUCK WHAT SHE'LL SAY, FUCK WHAT SHE'LL DO, FUCK HOW HE'LL REACT, I'M FUCKING TELLING HIM."

GC: 4ND WH4T H4PP3N3D?

"JUST WHAT I SHOULD'VE FUCKING EXPECTED WOULD HAPPEN. HE SAID SHE'D TOLD HIM WE'D SAY THAT. HE SAID SHE'D SAID SHE'D TRICKED US ALL AND HE SHOULDN'T BELIEVE US, BECAUSE THIS WAS WHAT SHE'D MADE UP FOR HIM AS SOME SORT OF FUCKING TEST. TO MAKE UP FOR-- FUCK, I DON'T KNOW, THAT TIME HE DIDN'T STAB HER OR WHATEVER. I ASKED IF HE REALLY BELIEVED ANY OF THAT BULLSHIT AND HE SAID HE HAD TO TRY." Karkat rubbed his temples, scowling, voice twisted and pained. "AND THE WORST FUCKING PART IS... IF I HADN'T SEEN IT... I'D PROBABLY FALL FOR THAT FUCKING BAIT MYSELF."

He closed his eyes, looking down, and she thought it was best not to disturb him.

GC: BY TH3 W4Y. 1F YOU'R3 ST1LL 4CC3PT1NG N4M3S?   
TG: sure what the fuck less work   
GC: T4VROS N1TR4M.  
GC: 4d10sTor34dor TO YOU.   
TG: oh yeah the worst troll ever  
TG: i was thinking id probably let him off just for being such a failure at trolling  
TG: speaks to a certain basic decency  
TG: and stupidity but fuck ill take what i can get  
TG: he plotting against her   
GC: NO.  
GC: H3'S PL4Y1NG L4PDOG. 1T'S QU1T3 P4TH3T1C.   
TG: then why shouldnt i kick his ass   
GC: B3C4US3 OF WHY H3'S PL4Y1NG L4PDOG.  
GC: TH3 POOR STUP1D FUCK1NG B4ST4RD TH1NKS SH3 M1GHT H4V3 L3T H3R L1V3.   
TG: what  
TG: who  
TG: jade?  
TG: and shes telling him she  
TG: christ  
TG: is there any way  
TG: bitch isnt telling the truth is she

She looked up. "YOU'R3 4BSOLUT3LY SUR3."

"AS IF I COULD FUCKING FORGET." His eyes were still hidden away; she'd lay even odds that he was crying. "I SAW IT. I STILL DO."

GC: NO.   
TG: absolutely fucking sure?   
GC: K4RK4T S4YS SO. H3 S4YS H3 S4W 1T.  
GC: H3 W4S N3V3R 4 L14R, 4ND SUR3 4S FUCK NOT TH1S GOOD OF ON3.   
TG: and what the fuck was he doing huh  
TG: what the fuck was he doing while she died   
GC: D3SP1T3 H1S LONG H1STORY OF H1D1NG FROM 4NYTH1NG BLOODY L1K3 4 COW4RD...  
GC: TH3 BROK3N L3GS B34R OUT H1S STORY TH4T SH3 C4UGHT H1M BY SURPR1S3.  
GC: H3 GOT TH3R3 TOO L4T3. SH3 PL4NNED 1T W3LL.

"YOU MISS HIM, DON'T YOU?"

Terezi's head jerked up. "WHO?" she typed.

"WHAT'S-HIS-NAME, THE RED ONE. THE KNIGHT OF TIME. THE 'COOLK1D'." He shifted his arms again, looking uncomfortable. "EVERYONE KNEW YOU LIKED HIM."

"L1K3 YOU L1K3D H3R?" she shot back, stung.

"I... I DON'T KNOW, IT WAS ONLY A COUPLE FUCKING DAYS, IT FELT LIKE FUCKING YEARS AND REAL ROMANCES... FUCK, I SHOULD TRY TELLING SOLLUX THAT. I DON'T KNOW. I LIKED HER A LOT."

"...Y34H," she sent. "1 DON'T KNOW. 1 L1K3D H1M TOO."

"...WE'VE GOT TO DO SOMETHING," he said.

TG: not well enough   
\--turntechGodhead has disconnected--

"OH, 1'V3 GOT 4 COUPL3 1RONS 1N TH3 F1R3," she said.

\--

TG: in the pantheon ruled criminal justice system the people are represented by two seperate but equally important groups  
TG: the trolls who investigate warcrimes  
TG: and the badass timeshifters who prosecute the offenders  
TG: these are their stories  
TG: DUN DUN   
GC: YOU'R3 1N 4 GOOD MOOD. >:]   
TG: why not might as well enjoy what i can  
TG: so whaddaya got for me   
GC: SOLLUX C4PTOR, AKA tw1n4rm3gddons.   
TG: huh dont think i talked to him   
GC: H3 THOUGHT TROLL1NG YOU W4S STUP1D.   
TG: ok point for him i guess  
TG: whats he up to  
TG: not oppressing the masses like certain dictatrix bitches i could name   
GC: H3 TH1NKS TH4T'S STUP1D TOO.   
TG: hell yeah nother point for him  
TG: whats he doing to stop it   
GC: W3LL, H3'S NOT DO1NG 4NYTH1NG 4G41NST VR1SK4.  
GC: BUT, TH4T'S B3C34US3 H3'S TOO BUSY TRY1NG TO G3T H1S G1RLFR13ND TO L3T H1M K1LL 3R1D4N.  
GC: YOU'LL BR34K H1S L1TTL3 H34RT 1F YOU G3T TO H1M B3FOR3 H1M.   
TG: killing the potter douchebag thats shit i can get behind  
TG: whys his girlfriend holding him back   
GC: AH, F3F3R1. 4S 3MPR3SS, SH3 F33LS 4 C3RT41N R3SPONS1B1L1TY FOR TH3 FUTUR3 OF OUR R4C3.   
TG: what the fuck empress  
TG: you people have empresses   
GC: OH, Y3S, TH3 UND3RW4T3R RUL1NG CL4SS.  
GC: WOULD YOU L1K3 M3 TO T3LL YOU 4BOUT OUR BLOOD H13R4RCHY?   
TG: fuck no   
GC: SO 1NCUR1OUS. >:[   
TG: dont tell me harry potter is actually a prince   
GC: ONLY OF DOUCH3B4GS, MY FR13ND, ONLY OF DOUCH3B4GS.  
GC: ...H3 1S *K1ND* OF ROY4L, THOUGH.   
TG: great  
TG: am i gonna get my ass charged with regicide   
GC: L1K3 1 S41D...  
GC: MOSTLY, P3OPL3 W1LL B3 4NGRY TH4T YOU B34T TH3M TO 1T.   
TG: you snooze you lose  
TG: i dont give a fuck   
GC: 1ND33D, F1RST COM3 F1RST S3RV3D. >:]  
GC: OH, HUH, 'R3G1C1D3' 1S 4 HUMAN CR1M3.  
GC: 1 SUPPOS3 TH4T M4K3S S3NS3.   
TG: what its not illegal to kill rulers where you come from   
GC: 1F TH3Y C4N'T D3F3ND TH3MS3LV3S, WHY SHOULD TH3Y B3 RUL1NG?   
TG: wait  
TG: is it illegal to kill anybody at all where you come from   
GC: W3LL, T3CHN1C4LLY.   
TG: "technically"   
GC: USU4LLY SUCH 4CCOUNTS 4RE S3TTL3D BY SURV1V1NG LUS11, D3P3ND3NTS, F4M1LY, WH4T3V3R 1NT3R3ST3D P4RTY G3TS TH3R3 F1RST.  
GC: 4S SUCH, TH3 COURTS N33D NOT B3 1NVOLV3D.  
GC: USU4LLY, L3G1SL4C3R4TORS AR3 CONC3RN3D W1TH TH3FT 4ND CORRUPT1ON TR14LS.  
GC: TH3R3 1S 4N 4WFUL LOT OF CORRUPT1ON.   
TG: so murders not a crime at all   
GC: T3CHN1C4LLY, 1T 1S.  
GC: BUT 1T 1S 4 R4R3 C4S3 TH4T QU4L1F13S FOR OFF1C14L PROS3CUT1ON.  
GC: TH3 CR1M3 MUST B3 S3V3R3 4ND THOROUGHLY UNW4RR4NT3D.  
GC: FURTH3RMOR3, TH3 V1CT1M'S C1RCL3 OF 4CQU41NT3NC3S MUST H4V3 B33N 1LL3G4LLY B4RR3D FROM S33K1NG PROP3R R3V3NG3 1N SOM3 W4Y.  
GC: 4DD1T1ON4LLY, TH3 PROS3CUTOR MUST B3 CONV1NC3D OF TH3 F41R GROUNDS OF TH3 C4S3, OR SH3 M4Y NOT CHOOS3 TO PROS3CUT3.  
GC: 1 DON'T TH1NK TH3R3'S B33N 4 MURD3R TR14L 1N L1V1NG M3MORY.  
GC: 1T'S SO R4R3 1 N3V3R 3V3N H3LD 4 MOCK S3SS1ON, 1 TH1NK.  
GC: 3V3N 1F 1 COULD B3 4 PROS3CUTOR14L OFF1C3R B4CK HOM3, 1'D N3V3R H4V3 GOTT3N TH3 CH4NC3.   
TG: oh really  
TG: that makes a lot of things make more sense   
GC: >:?   
TG: a severe and unwarranted crime  
TG: that the victims couldnt avenge on their own  
TG: with a perpetrator that the prosecutor is just as eager to see fry  
TG: congratulations terezi  
TG: youre the first troll in however-the-fuck-long to actually prosecute a case of murder   
GC: !!   
TG: holy christ that is fucked up   
GC: COULD YOU STOP W1TH TH3 CULTUR4L 1NS3NS1T1V1TY FOR 4 MOM3NT?  
GC: MY M1ND 1S B31NG BLOWN H3R3 >:O   
TG: really hadnt occured to you huh   
GC: W3LL TH4T 1S CL34RLY 4LL YOUR F4ULT!!  
GC: YOU'VE GOT M3 PL4Y1NG D3F3NS3!!  
GC: NO S4N3 L3G1SL4C3R4TOR WOULD B3 *3L1M1N4T1NG* C4ND1D4T3S FOR PROS3CUT1ON. >:O   
TG: well hey up to you  
TG: but i dont have time for a genocide  
TG: even if there are only like twelve of you  
TG: i mean sure im badass enough  
TG: and it might not even be the worst idea in the world  
TG: but fuck it lets be lazy  
TG: not like i got nothing on my plate  
TG: resistances to meet arms to deal robots to slay  
TG: fucking chinese buffet up in here  
TG: were talking lethal MSG  
TG: you gotta move with the flow  
TG: know your limits  
TG: take what you eat and eat what you take  
TG: peg the orange chicken off that mofo moo shus head  
TG: ok the metaphor breaks down here a little  
TG: not doing my best work these days   
GC: 1 TH1NK 1T WOULD H4V3 B33N 4W3SOM3, 1F 1 KN3W WH4T 4 CH1N3S3 BUFF3T W4S. >:[   
TG: well you have the internets  
TG: literally  
TG: all of them  
TG: check it out  
TG: ufo up ahead g2g   
-turntechGodhead has disconnected-

\--

Technically, she knew, she'd been lying when she said she'd never expected to prosecute a murder trial. She'd dreamed of having Vriska Serket as the victim of her first prosecution for years. It had been a largely hopeless dream, granted-- she was always quite careful about leaving dependents alive, the most brilliant part of her damned lusus's schemes. How did you prosecute a case when all the wronged were dead?

Still, she hadn't quite made the obvious connection. Here, for the first time, coniugatus in familia, coniugatus in amicita, coniugatus in sangua-- joined in family, friendship, and blood, when only one was strictly required. It was the perfect cap to the prosecution she had been building all these years; she could not, and would not, fail.

TG: yo   
GC: COOLK1D!!  
GC: MY PULCHR1TUD1NOUS PROS3CUTOR14L PROXY.  
GC: 4ND HOW 4R3 YOU ON THIS LOV3LY 34RTH D4Y?   
TG: man youre really into prosecuting that bitch arent you  
TG: its cool i can get behind that  
TG: anyway ive been planning to assassinate harry potter  
TG: and i was wondering if you had any tips   
GC: HMM, 1 TH1NK 1 L1K3 TH3 ORD3R H3R3.  
GC: 4SC3ND1NG D1FF1CULTY, TO B3 SUR3.   
TG: even though hes a prince or whatever   
GC: 1 R3P34T...  
GC: M41NLY, P3OPL3 W1LL B3 4NGRY YOU B34T TH3M TO 1T.  
GC: L3T M3 RUN DOWN SOM3 CR1M3S OF H1S YOU M4Y NOT B3 AW4R3 OF.  
GC: H3 MURD3R3D TWO OF OUR NUMB3R AFT3R TH3Y ATTEMPT3D TO D1SSU4D3 H1M FROM B3TR4Y1NG US 4LL 4ND G3TT1NG H1S DUMB 4SS K1LLED 1N THE B4RG41N.   
TG: yeah that made the sburb news  
TG: word got around  
TG: even though almost no one there was alive to tell it at that point   
GC: OK4Y TH3N.  
GC: H1S MOST 3GR3G1OUS CR1M3S YOU KNOW.  
GC: TH3R3 4R3 TWO PO1NTS TH4T R3M41N P3RT1N3NT.  
GC: ON3:  
GC: SOLLUX W4NTS TO K1LL H1M N34RLY 4S MUCH 4S YOU DO.   
TG: yeah you mentioned that  
TG: what for   
GC: B3C4US3 H3 KNOCK3D H1M OUT,  
GC: BL1ND3D H1M,  
GC: 4ND TH3N K1LL3D H1S G1RLFR13ND.  
GC: 3V3N 1F 1T W4S T3MPOR4RY. H3 W4S 4 LOT MOR3 OK4Y W1TH 1T B3FOR3 TH1S R3SURRECT1ON 4ND P4NTH3ON BULLSH1T.   
TG: okay makes sense  
TG: still gonna have to get in line though  
TG: whats point two   
GC: 1 W4S G3TT1NG TO TH4T!!  
GC: 1MP4TI3NT PROVOK3R OF PROS3CUT1ON!!  
GC: PO1NT TWO 1S,  
GC: H3 H4S 1NS1ST3D ON HUM4N GU4RDS,  
GC: FOR GOD 4LON3 KNOWS WH4T R34SON,  
GC: WH1CH 1S 1NCR3D1BLY FUCK1NG STUP1D.  
GC: TH1S 1S NOT JUST B3C4US3 TH3 ROBOT GU4RDS 4R3 MOR3 3FF1C13NT.  
GC: 1T 1S B3C4US3 1T 1S 4LL BUT 1MPOSS1BLE FOR 4 S4P13NT B31NG TO B3 N34R H1M FOR MOR3 TH4N F1VE M1NUT3S W1THOUT F33LING TH3 MOST PR1M4L OF BL4CK P4SS1ONS ST1RR1NG UP TH31R SOUL.  
GC: 4ND TH4T'S 3V3N 1F YOU'R3 H1S 3QUAL.  
GC: 1NF3R1OR? 1NTOL3R4BL3.  
GC: SL4V3 R4C3? W3LL.  
GC: 4LL 1'LL S4Y 1S YOU'D B3TT3R HURRY B3FOR3 ON3 OF TH3 GU4RDS FORG3TS TH3 THR34T TO H1S L1FE 4ND F4M1LY 4ND DO3S TH3 D33D H1MS3LF.  
GC: 1T'S 4LL M4L3S, H3 4LW4YS W4S 4 P1G TH4T W4Y...   
TG: wait  
TG: threat to their life and family   
GC: HOW 3LS3 WOULD W3 D4R3 T4K3 HUM4NS 4S GU4RDS?   
TG: goddammit  
TG: got to take care of them then  
TG: makes shit more complicated   
GC: T4K3 C4R3 OF YOURS3LF, MY AW3SOM3 AUX1L14TOR OF JUST1C3.  
GC: YOU H4V3 TO L1VE, SO W3 C4N ST4G3 TH3 TR14L OF TH3 M1LL3N1UM.  
GC: DON'T YOU WORRY. 1 N3V3R LOS3 4 C4S3.   
TG: man if you start getting all ace attorney up in this   
GC: ?   
TG: its a game series  
TG: you know what you should check it out  
TG: get yourself one and say its from me  
TG: you know  
TG: what id get you if i had any money  
TG: or your mail wasnt screened  
TG: or i cared that much   
GC: OOH, S1CK BURN.  
GC: TH3 FL4M3S, TH3Y 4R3 S3TT1NG TH1S PL4C3 4LL ON F1R3.   
TG: youd like it i hear theres a chick with a whip   
GC: TH3 P4L4C3 1GN1T3S W1TH TH3 HOLY FL4M3S OF JUST1C3.  
GC: TH3 UNR1GHT3OUS SCR34M FOR M3RCY 4ND 4R3 4FFORD3D NON3.   
TG: ok thats probably enough   
GC: TH3 BLOOD OF TH3 OFF3ND3RS 1S TH3 ONLY R1V3R TH4T C4N QU3NCH TH3 3T3RN4L FL4M3S.  
GC: TH3 GLOR1OUS HOLY R1V3R OF 4LL TH3 D3L1C1OUS R41NBOW BLOOD TH3R3 1S.  
GC: 4ND 1T MUST FLOW.  
GC: W3 W1LL M4K3 1T FLOW, YOU 4ND 1.  
GC: >:]   
TG: uh  
TG: right  
TG: resistance meeting g2g   
\--turntechGodhead has disconnected--

She smirked; typical human squeamishness. Even he fell victim sometimes. It was nice to know she could still get to him... that she hadn't gone completely soft.

Idly, she looked up the games he'd mentioned; all about these "defense attorneys", such an insult. She was about to dismiss it entirely as an attempt to "get her goat", until she saw that the most recent entry focused on a human prosecutor.

It was worth a shot, she figured, at least to see how angry she should be over the insult when next he called. Besides... it might be interesting to get a taste of human "prosecution". Though it could never measure up to the thrill of the real thing.

\--

GC: OBJ3CT1ON!!!!!!!!!!!!

"OH, FOR FUCK'S SAKE." Karkat dodged agily out of the way of the cane that was lashed at him, despite his still-healing legs; the instinct had come quickly. "COULD YOU PLEASE STOP BEING OBSESSED WITH GAMES FOR STUPID HUMAN GIRLS ALREADY?!"

GC: FOOL1SHLY FOOL1SH FOOL WHO DO3S NOT KNOW OF WH4T H3 SP34KS!!  
GC: YOU H4V3N'T TR13D 1T, SO YOU DON'T UND3RST4ND.  
GC: 1T 1S...  
GC: 4N 4W3SOM3 G4M3.  
GC: M4YB3 TH3 B3ST HUM4N G4M3.  
GC: UNT1L YOU H4V3 TR13D 1T YOU C4N SHUT YOUR FOOL1SH MOUTH. >:]

"I SHOULD FIND THE GUY WHO CAME UP WITH THE STUPID IDEA AND KICK HIS ASS," Karkat muttered, rubbing one of the welts that remained from an unsuccessful attempt at dodging. "A LEGISLACERATOR WITH A WHIP, IT'S LIKE THEY WERE TRYING TO MAKE MY LIFE WORSE."

GC: OH, K4RK4T, TH4T 1S WH4T 1S SO SP3C14L 4BOUT YOU.  
GC: WHO 3V3N H4S TO TRY??  
GC: 1T JUST COM3S N4TUR4LLY, L1K3 R1V3RS FLOW TO THE S34, L1K3 BLOOD F4LLS TO TH3 GROUND.  
GC: HOW C4N YOU BL4M3 US FOR FOLLOW1NG TH3 L4WS OF N4TUR3??

"YOU KNOW, I'D ALMOST FUCKING BELIEVE IT," he muttered. "A SPECIAL FUNDAMENTAL FORCE IN THE UNIVERSE, DEDICATED TO MAKING MY LIFE MISERABLE. YOU KNOW WHAT, I THINK YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT. AREN'T YOU BREAKING THAT RULE BY TELLING ME?"

GC: NO, 1 TH1NK YOU'LL B3 JUST 4S M1S3R4BL3 KNOW1NG. >:]  
GC: 4FT3R 4LL, 1T GO3S BOTH W4YS.  
GC: NO M4TT3R WH4T 4NYON3 ELS3 DO3S, YOU'LL F1ND 4 W4Y TO B3 M1S3R4BL3 4NYW4Y.  
GC: SO WHY F1GHT 1T? YOU KNOW YOU LOV3 1T, D33P DOWN.

"IF I DIDN'T KNOW HOW MUCH DYING SUCKED BY NOW, I'D FUCKING SHOOT MYSELF," Karkat grumbled.

GC: YOU S33M P4RT1CUL4RLY ON-3DG3 TOD4Y.  
GC: WH4T 1S 1T?

"NOTHING," Karkat muttered, as usual, folding his arms in a blatantly defensive posture. Clearly there were issues with this witness's testimony.

GC: HOLD 1T!!!

"OH WHAT THE CHRIST."

GC: YOU 4R3 CL34RLY P4RT1CUL4RLY CR4BBY TOD4Y!  
GC: TH1S DO3S NOT M3SH W1TH YOUR T3ST1MONY TH4T NOTH1NG 1S GO1NG ON.

"TESTIMONY? WHAT THE FUCK?"

GC: DO NOT TRY TO FOOL TH3 COURTS, K4RCR4B. >:]  
GC: TH3 TRUTH W1LL OUT.  
GC: HOW3V3R LONG 1T T4K3S. 

"M-Mistress! MISTRESSSS!!"

Terezi jumped; she noticed Karkat folding his arms a little tighter as she turned toward the door. A human voice, obviously running toward Vriska with news-- maybe he'd done it; maybe today had been the day. She checked her phone; no messages.

"What the hell? St8 your 8usiness!!!!!!!!"

Terezi tensed at the sound of her voice, pressing closer toward the door. She noticed that Karkat was too, though he was trying and utterly failing to pretend he didn't care.

"M-Mistress, there's news from San-- New Ampora."

"Fucking Eridan. What's that dum8ass doing now?"

"He's-- Mistress, he's dead."

Silence in the hall; a whispered "fuck, yes," from Karkat. Not a surprised 'fuck, yes', either. But how could _he_ have seen this coming?

Her phone chimed; she flipped it open quickly, stopping the sound short.

TG: so i was gonna kill hp today  
TG: had the timing all right and everything

"How did it happen?" Vriska asked, voice far too calm. Terezi had heard that there was a human saying, "Don't shoot the messenger". Trolls would agree that shooting was too quick, but she suspected that wasn't what the humans meant.

TG: had this whole fucking plan set out like clockwork  
TG: cause everything i fucking do is that way  
TG: laser-cut and high precision  
TG: thats how time travel is its all got to mesh together  
TG: it looks like theres messy edges sometimes but theres not if youre doing it right  
TG: which is how you gotta do it if you want to come out alive

"Someone-- someone breached his defenses, Mistress. Completely and utterly."

"What the fuck were the 8uards doing?"

"We-- no one can find them, Mistress."

TG: so i had a plan  
TG: got people set up to take care of the guards  
TG: i mean after  
TG: literally take care of  
TG: cause you were right they took one look at his ass getting attacked and were all  
TG: meh  
TG: effort  
TG: whats the worst that can happen  
TG: he gets maimed and we have to cart his hipster ass around  
TG: probably on a fucking litter like goddamn slave boys  
TG: not worth it  
TG: and that part actually worked just fine

"No one can FIND them????!!!! You'd 8etter start looking!!!!!!!!"

"Yes, Mistress, we are, Mistress, but--!"

"Who the hell finally got to the 8astard?"

TG: it was the killing prince douchebag part that all went wrong  
TG: i mean i put some fucking effort into infiltrating that place  
TG: surveillance and wallclimbing and all sorts of fancy spy shit  
TG: and then when i got there  
TG: there was this troll chick  
TG: she was one of you cause she had one of those dumbass shirts  
TG: and she was wearing this ridiculous red skirt  
TG: long and tight and ruffly  
TG: how do chicks move around in that kind of shit how dont you trip  
TG: and she had this purple headband  
TG: and also  
TG: she had this purple chainsaw  
TG: and she looked at me  
TG: and she said  
TG: Oh Sorry  
TG: I Didnt Mean To Disrupt Your Revenge  
TG: I Just Hate This Fucking Asshole, You See  
TG: and then she offered me a leg

The messenger was still waffling, trying to say anything but the truth, and now she knew why: Vriska was not going to take this well. Terezi looked up at Karkat, who was checking a phone of his own, a grim, satisfied look in his eyes.

"You kn3w," she croaked.

"FOUND OUT ALREADY? SO YOU DO HAVE IRONS IN THE FIRE."

"You _kn3w_ ," she repeated, stunned. She knew she shouldn't be. It wasn't just coincidence that had made Karkat into a leader-- and even if it had been, there were lessons you could never unlearn.

"WHAT????!!!!" Vriska shrieked, loud enough to warn the whole castle.

"She-- she was found at the scene, Mistress-- she was found with a bloody chainsaw in her hands-- smiling--"

TG: ...  
TG: what i think im getting at  
TG: what i thinks occured to me  
TG: is that by human standards  
TG: youre all fucking psychopaths  
TG: and im leaving alone the ones i like  
TG: and killing the ones i dont  
TG: when theres probably not much of a difference at all  
TG: but  
TG: i dont know what else to do

"SORRY IF OUR PLANS OVERLAPPED," said Karkat, not _quite_ smug about it, but insufferably close. " LET'S WORK TOGETHER NEXT TIME."

He limped away, and Vriska was still screaming, but Terezi didn't pay attention; she was watching the words spill onto the screen, line after line, spilling out and out and there was nothing she could say, nothing to do but watch in fascination.

TG: i dont think theres anything else i can do  
TG: she said you were all doomed anyway  
TG: due to prince douchebag, no fucking surprise  
TG: maybe that makes things easier  
TG: fuck  
TG: i let her go  
TG: she was that chick of roses i think  
TG: much as i dont want to think about it  
TG: and i do mean not at fucking all  
TG: i do not want to think about weird timefucked cross-species crushes on my paradox sister  
TG: but i think she had one  
TG: and he did kill her  
TG: and the hope of your race or whatever  
TG: so i guess i just think  
TG: thats reason to flip the fuck out  
TG: even with a chainsaw if thats what you got  
TG: i can understand that  
TG: and hows it different from what im doing anyway  
TG: maybe no one has a choice  
TG: so i let her go  
TG: and no one will sell me any goddamn alcohol  
TG: worlds fucking ending and you care im underage  
TG: anyway just thought id keep you posted  
TG: gonna be killing doombots for a while see if it clears my head   
\--turntechGodhead has disconnected--

"L3t's work tog3th3r," she murmured.

Not a very troll-like sentiment, but it looked like it was going to happen no matter what they tried.

\--

"JESUS CHRIST, I'M GETTING SICK OF THAT SONG," said Karkat, hands over his ears. The landing was only a floor away from Kanaya's room, where she'd been locked up since the Eridan incident-- mostly voluntarily. She hadn't said a word, not to anyone, but she'd been playing music _loudly_ \-- she had a small repertoire of songs, but once she started on one, she would play it over and over and over for hours on end.

GC: W3 COULD 4LW4YS M33T SOM3WH3R3 3LS3.

"NO, SHE HATES IT JUST AS MUCH, THAT MEANS SHE WON'T BE LISTENING. SECURITY, GODDAMN IT, WE HAVE TO PAY ATTENTION TO THIS SHIT THIS TIME."

Terezi rolled her eyes; like he had a right to be complaining, he could probably barely hear it with his normal troll ears. Not like she could, over and over, the same goddamn song: _What you don't know won't hurt you: maybe the lies are true. Try to remember, try to forget those yesterdays being through--_

GC: H4V3 YOU H4D 4NY LUCK G3TT1NG THROUGH TO H3R?

"NO. GUESS YOU'VE TRIED TOO, THEN." Karkat leaned against the wall, folding his arms. "YOU'D THINK KILLING ERIDAN WOULD'VE MADE HER HAPPY. IT SURE AS FUCK MADE _ME_ HAPPY. "

GC: 3R1D4N NOT B31NG D34D Y3T M1GHT'V3 B33N TH3 ONLY TH1NG K33P1NG H3R GO1NG.  
GC: 4FT3R TH3 M4TR1ORB, 4ND TH3 B3TR4Y4L, 4ND ROS3...

"WE'RE CALLING THE HUMANS BY NAME, NOW? YEAH, YOU'RE NOT ATTACHED AT ALL. CANDLELIGHT PITY DATE, PARTY OF NONE."

GC: OH SHUT TH3 FUCK UP.

 _You'll never see me coming. You'll never know my name. Try to remember, try to forget, but you'll never be the same--_

"...WE'RE FUCKUPS, YOU KNOW," said Karkat, surprisingly quietly; the takeover and the game had done things to him, and she wasn't at all sure she liked them. "COMPLETE AND UTTER FUCKUPS. SHITTY EXCUSES FOR TROLLS. TOP OF THE FUCKING CULLING LIST."

GC: M4YB3 1 DON'T G1V3 4 SH1T 4BOUT WH4T W3 W3R3 SUPPOS3D TO B3 4NYMOR3.  
GC: M4YB3 1 JUST C4R3 4BOUT WH4T'S R1GHT.

"BUT YOU DID THAT TO BEGIN WITH," said Karkat. "THAT'S WHAT MADE YOU... NOT VRISKA."

GC: HOW S1CK3N1NGLY SW33T. <3

"...HOW DO YOU SAY ONE OF-- NOT LIKE I WAS GOING TO. FUCK NO, THAT WOULD BE STUPID."

GC: "H34RT"? >:]

"...IRONS," said Karkat, and she sighed. Down to business. "I KNOW YOU HAVE THEM. WHAT DO YOU KNOW?"

GC: 1 H4V3 SOM3ON3 ON TH3 OUTS1D3.  
GC: 4N 4G3NT, 4S 1T W3R3.  
GC: TH3R3 4R3 R3S1ST4NC3 MOV3M3NTS.  
GC: H3 W1LL NOT T3LL M3 MOR3.

"I HOPE YOU'RE NOT FEEDING HIM TOO MUCH INFORMATION," Karkat muttered. "THEY PROBABLY WANT US ALL DEAD TOO."

GC: NOT TH1S ON3.  
GC: TH1S ON3 1S S3L3CT1V3.

"GEE, WHY THE FUCK WOULD HE POSSIBLY LIE."

GC: 1 H4V3N'T TOLD H1M 4NYTH1NG 4BOUT TH3 M41N COMPOUND, WORRYW4RT.  
GC: 1 D1D T3LL H1M 3R1D4N'S GU4RD P4TT3RNS, THOUGH.  
GC: SH4M3 K4N4Y4 B34T H1M TO 1T.

"GUESS I CAN'T ARGUE WITH THAT." Karkat sighed himself. "EQUIUS IS TOO BUSY KISSING FEFERI'S ASS OR SOMETHING TO KICK UP MUCH OF A FUSS. BUT... WHAT THE FUCK DO WE DO ABOUT... HIM?"

GC: 1S H3 ST1LL H1GH?

"I THINK SO, KEEPS TALKING ABOUT HIS FRIEND MaRyJaNe OR SOME BULLSHIT, AT LEAST IT'S IN ALTERNATING CAPS. BUT WHAT IF HE'S FAKING IT? AND WHAT IF HE'S NOT? WE CAN'T JUST LEAVE HIM THERE, BUT IF HE'S NOT ACTUALLY GONE FUCKING PSYCHO AGAIN YET--" Karkat rubbed his forehead. "GAH, THIS IS FUCKING IMPOSSIBLE!!"

GC: MY 4G3NT 1S D3T3RM1N3D TO GO 4FT3R H1M.

"A HUMAN? AGAINST GAMZEE FUCKING MAKARA? THAT'S FUCKING SUICIDE. AND WAIT, HOW THE FUCK DOES HE KNOW GAMZEE EXISTS IN THE FIRST PLACE? HAS HE EVEN BEEN ON ANY OF THE BROADCASTS?!"

GC: 1'M WORR13D MYS3LF.  
GC: H3 1S C4P4BL3, THOUGH. 4ND TOT4LLY D3T3RM1N3D.  
GC: 1 DON'T TH1NK 1 COULD STOP H1M.

"WELL, TELL HIM I SAID GOODBYE," said Karkat, standing up. "AFTER WHAT I SAW HIM DO TO-- TELL HIM I SAID GOODBYE."

GC: W41T.  
GC: WH4T DO YOU M34N?

"I-- NEVER SAID IT WAS HER, THAT I COULDN'T STOP," said Karkat. "SHE-- SHE GOT THEM TO-- AND WHEN THE FUCK DID SHE BECOME A LEADER, ANYWAY? AND WHY THE FUCK DOES EVERY FUCKING PSYCHO LET ME LIVE?!"

Terezi opened her mouth, reflexively, but Karkat was already gone, faster than she'd ever seen him on those crutches, and on reflection, she really wasn't sure what she could say.

She pulled out her phone, reading the message-window she hadn't been able to bring herself to close one more time.

TG: nice try rez  
TG: i found the juggalo motherfucker  
TG: and im not letting him go  
TG: dont worry  
TG: i'm gonna kick his ass  
TG: hopping a train see you on the flip side   
\--turntechGodhead has disconnected--

 _Try to remember, try to forget, but you'll never be the same--_

"Would you stop w1th th4t moth3rfuck1ng song!!" Terezi tried to scream, and grimaced, swallowing down blood. It'd only come out as a harsh whisper; she never would've heard it anyway.

And there wasn't a thing in the world she could say to stop him.

\--

She wasn't sure why she was playing this game to try to distract herself when he was the one who'd pointed her toward the goddamn thing; she was thinking of him every moment, flubbing every cross-examination. She felt vaguely ashamed for destroying the main character's dignity this way, but she couldn't stay focused, not for anything.

GC: YOU KNOW, FORG1NG 3V1D3NC3 1S 4PP4R3NTLY 1LL3G4L 1N HUM4N JUST1C3 SYST3MS?   
CG: YOUR FUCKWIT AGENT'S REALLY TRYING IT, ISN'T HE?  
CG: HOLY SHIT. HE IS STUPID, AND FOR NOT KILLING HIM YOURELF, YOU MIGHT BE WORSE.  
CG: FUCK, I HOPE HE DOESN'T FUCK UP EVEN WORSE AND SEND GAMZEE INTO ONE OF THOSE...  
CG: THINGS.

Terezi winced; the coolkid had said that he might've done it, once, was at least one of the first people to witness Gamzee's breakdown. She hadn't been able to reassure him, no one knew if Gamzee had any trigger but the lack of drugs, but if he had done it before-- or if he was a trigger this time... the Bard of Rage, walking the earth. It'd make the takeover transition look like... she couldn't really think of anything in Alternian society that was anything less than genocidal. The point stood.

CG: WHERE HAS HE BEEN HIDING, ANYWAY?   
GC: H3 S4YS SOM3WH3RE NORTH.  
GC: COLD, 4ND 1SOL4T3D, 4ND BY TH3 S34.  
GC: TH4T'S 4LL H3'D S4Y.   
CG: SHOULD HE BE THERE BY NOW?  
CG: BY WHICH I MEAN, ARE WE FUCKED YET?   
GC: 1T'S H4RD TO T3LL.  
GC: 1 TH1NK SO.

She looked back down at her DS, and was startled into an actual laugh, a stab through her raspy throat.

GC: 4H H4 H4, TH1S 1S TH3 B3ST G4M3 3V3R.   
CG: OH WHAT THE FUCK  
CG: ARE WE TALKING ABOUT THIS STUPID GAME OF YOURS INSTEAD OF YOUR DUMBASS FRIEND GETTING KILLED?   
GC: OBJ3CT1ON!!!!  
GC: GO 4W4Y!!!!!  
GC: >X]   
CG: OH WHAT THE FUCK EVER.

Another window popped up; she nearly dropped her phone, she switched to it so quickly. "Friend". She supposed he was a friend.

TG: god fucking dammit   
GC: WH4T'S WRONG?!   
TG: when did i get so fucking slow  
TG: used to live ten days at once moving like lightning  
TG: knight of fucking time goddammit  
TG: why doesnt that mean a goddamn thing   
GC: WH4T 4R3 YOU T4LK1NG 4BOUT??  
GC: 4R3 YOU OK4Y??   
TG: im just fucking dandy  
TG: here in fucking maine with nothing to do   
GC: WH4T?   
TG: i mean i got beat again  
TG: someone beat me to it  
TG: hes already dead

"Wh4t?!" Terezi shrieked, and spent a good thirty seconds swallowing and coughing against the blood and pain. She straightened as quickly as she could, switching chat windows.

GC: OH HOLY SH1T  
GC: H3'S D34D   
CG: WELL DUH.  
CG: I'M SORRY, BUT I WARNED YOU.  
CG: NO HUMAN STOOD A CHANCE AGAINST HIM. NOT EVEN WE STOOD A CHANCE AGAINST HIM.   
GC: NOT H1M, YOU 1D1OT.  
GC: G4MZ33!!

She switched to the other window, typing furiously; luckily there was no one around to see, not here, not today.

GC: HOW?!??   
TG: man how should i know  
TG: happened before i showed up  
TG: not by long i think  
TG: how long does troll blood take to dry  
TG: never mind i dont want to know  
TG: i dont want to know you know

CG: NO FUCKING WAY.  
CG: NO FUCKING WAY.  
CG: SOME HUMAN MANAGED TO KILL THE BARD OF FUCKING RAGE?!  
CG: HE'S A LIAR.   
GC: SHUT UP, K4RK4T, H3 S4YS H3 W4S D34D WH3N H3 GOT TH3R3!!  
GC: POOR TH1NG, H3 H4SN'T GOTT3N TO K1LL 4NYON3 4T 4LL >:[   
CG: WHAT?!  
CG: THEN WHO THE FUCK KILLED HIM?!

Terezi rubbed at her head, trying to think logically, even without her crack investigative team. What would she have sent them to do?

GC: 4R3 TH3R3 4NY F1NG3RPR1NTS?   
TG: what the fuck  
TG: what do you think i am csi  
TG: horatio fucking caine  
TG: i couldnt catch him  
TG: looks like he ran out   
*TG puts on shades   
TG: out of time  
TG: YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH   
GC: 4RRGH, WH4T3V3R TH3 FUCK TH1S 1S, W3 DON'T H4V3 T1M3 FOR 1T!!   
TG: what no troll david caruso   
GC: HUH?   
TG: wow thats actually surprising to me  
TG: guess he got   
*TG puts on shades   
TG: left out in the culled  
TG: YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH   
GC: D4MM1T, COOLK1D!!   
TG: the point is i dont have anything to take fingerprints with  
TG: and nothing to compare them with  
TG: and dont intend to stick around too long  
TG: its the ass end of nowhere but the bots are getting here eventually  
TG: actually i was surprised how many bots there were   
GC: 3QU1US. SO H3 KN3W.  
GC: TH4T 3XPL41NS WHY K4RK4T D1DN'T.   
TG: what

GC: YOU N3V3R 4SK3D 3QU1US WH3R3 G4MZ33 W4S, D1D YOU?   
CG: FUCK NO, WHY WOULD I TALK TO THAT CREEPY BASTARD IF I DIDN'T ABSOLUTELY  
CG: FUCK.  
CG: OF COURSE HE'D KEEP TRACK OF HIM, CREEPY FUCKER FUCKING GOT OFF ON BEING KILLED.  
CG: YOU REALLY THINK HE KNEW?   
GC: MY 4G3NT R3PORTS 4 D1SPROPORT1ON4T3 NUMB3R OF BOTS N34R TH3 SC3N3 OF TH3 CR1M3.  
GC: TH3Y W3R3 PROT3CT1NG SOM3TH1NG.   
CG: BUT THAT CREEPY FUCK WOULD NEVER HAVE DONE IT. NOT IN A MILLION YEARS.   
GC: TRU3...

GC: HOW 4BOUT TH3 C4US3 OF D34TH?   
TG: fuck if i know  
TG: theres a whole lot of blood  
TG: sure it looks like oil paint but its still fucking gross   
GC: DO YOU W4NT TO 4DV4NC3 TH3 COURS3 OF JUST1C3 OR NOT??   
TG: man whatever  
TG: it looks like  
TG: he was fucking mauled or something   
GC: ...  
GC: W41T, WH4T?!   
TG: like a tiger got him or something  
TG: but theres no tigers in bumfuck maine   
GC: OH.  
GC: MY.  
GC: GOD.   
TG: what

GC: K4RK4T.  
GC: H3 W4S M4UL3D.  
GC: 1T W4S FUCK1NG N3P3T4.   
CG: WHAT?!  
CG: NO FUCKING WAY. THERE IS NO FUCKING WAY.  
CG: THERE'S JUST NO FUCKING WAY!!  
CG: SHE DOESN'T HAVE THE FIREPOWER.   
GC: M4YB3 SH3'S B33N TR41N1NG.  
GC: M4YB3 H3 W4S TOO STON3D TO F1GHT.   
CG: I DON'T CARE, SHE WAS SO-- WELL, WEAK, DAMMIT!  
CG: HOW THE FUCK COULD SHE HAVE KILLED HIM?  
CG: AND WHY?!   
GC: ...  
GC: 3V3N 1F H3 D1DN'T M1ND...  
GC: H3 K1LL3D 3QU1US.  
GC: NOT TO M3NT1ON...   
CG: THERE'S NO FUCKING WAY.  
CG: THIS GUY'S LYING TO YOU.

GC: N3P3T4.  
GC: 1 C4N'T B3L13V3 1T.  
GC: 1T W4S SO 34SY TO FORG3T SH3 COULD HURT 4NYTH1NG 4T 4LL.  
GC: BUT SH3 COULD.   
TG: okay glad i could help theres another troll chick off my list  
TG: though why theyve got to kill everyone im after i dont know  
TG: dont you kill vriska before me i swear i will kick your ass   
GC: N3V3R. >:]   
TG: ok g2g bots on my ass  
TG: gonna see you in person soon  
TG: main events coming up and at least shell be easy to find  
TG: see you then   
\--turntechGodhead has disconnected--

Terezi swallowed. Not that she didn't believe in him, but... But yes, she was a little bit afraid.

No, fuck that. They'd put the traitor in her place, she and him, in a trial to go down in history.

GC: H3'S NOT LY1NG.   
CG: YOU'VE FOUND ANOTHER STUPID HUMAN BOY TO CRUSH ON, HAVEN'T YOU?  
CG: ANOTHER FUCKING "COOLKID". CHRIST, YOU ARE SO PREDICTABLE.  
CG: SOMEONE WHO REMINDS YOU OF HIM.   
GC: SHUT UP, 1 H4V3 NOT!!  
GC: H3 1S ON3 OF 4 K1ND.  
GC: W4S.  
GC: HE W4S ON3 OF 4 K1ND.   
CG: GOD DAMN IT, TEREZI, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO FUCKING COPE WITH IT.  
CG: THEY'RE DEAD. HE'S DEAD. SHE FUCKING KILLED HIM HERSELF.  
CG: SHE HAS FUCKING VIDEO. SHE HAS HIS BLOODSTAINED CLOTHES.  
CG: NOT EVEN A LACKEY. SHE KILLED HIM HERSELF. SHE PUT ONE OF HIS OWN FUCKING SWORDS THROUGH HIS BACK.  
CG: DO I HAVE TO SHOW YOU?!   
GC: V1D3O?  
GC: TH3 S1CK FUCK TOOK V1D3O?   
CG: I DIDN'T THINK YOU'D WANT TO SEE IT, SINCE YOU FLIPPED OUT ENOUGH LAST TIME.  
CG: AND THAT WAS JUST SOME DOOMED-TIMELINE DUPLICATE.  
CG: IT ISN'T PRETTY.  
CG: AND HE'S FUCKING DEAD.   
GC: SHUT UP.   
CG: I'M SORRY. YOU JUST NEED TO GET THAT THROUGH YOUR THICK SKULL.   
GC: K4RK4T, K4RK4T, SO FUCK1NG CH4RM1NG.  
GC: DON'T T3LL M3 WH4T 1 DO 4ND DON'T KNOW.  
GC: NOW FUCK OFF.   
\--gallowsCalibrator has blocked carcinoGeneticist\--

She bit her lip until she tasted blood. It wasn't a question she'd thought to ask before; she'd been too damn relieved.

 _How the hell had he gotten away?_

\--

GC: 1'M GO1NG TO K33P 4SK1NG.   
TG: no problem  
TG: im gonna keep not giving a fuck  
TG: glad weve come to an arrangement on this   
GC: HOW D1D YOU DO 1T?   
TG: secret   
GC: OH COM3 ON.   
TG: look its going down tomorrow okay  
TG: gotta break into a fucking palace kill the traitor bitch who killed my best friend  
TG: its gonna be pretty fucking busy  
TG: can i take one fucking night off   
GC: W1N3, WOM3N, 4ND SONG?   
TG: they still wont let me drink  
TG: these chicks are old enough to be my mother  
TG: and i havent been able to lay down any beats in fucking months  
TG: left all my shit at home  
TG: these shades cant handle that kind of processing   
GC: >:[   
TG: know enough music to get some down in a fucking notebook  
TG: looks shitty but should be readable  
TG: when shit settles down  
TG: ought to be able to put it together  
TG: if its worth anything  
TG: also is that some sort of troll saying   
GC: 1 P1CK3D 1T UP FROM SOM3WH3R3.   
TG: theres a show though.  
TG: gonna catch it  
TG; see if theres any fun to make in this town  
TG: catch some zs   
GC: 1 ST1LL W4NT TO KNOW HOW YOU D1D 1T.   
TG: god damn  
TG: could you ask me later then   
GC: >:[  
GC: ON3 DO3S NOT K33P 4 L3G1SL4C3R4TOR W41T1NG.  
GC: BUT UND3R TH3 C1RCUMST4NC3S...  
GC: 1 GU3SS 1'LL L3T YOU G3T 4W4Y W1TH 1T.  
GC: H4V3 FUN, COOLK1D.  
GC: JUST1C3 COM3S TOMORROW. >:]   
TG: yeah its nice working with you madam prosecutor  
TG: later   
\--turntechGodhead has disconnected--

There was video; this was true. It was fuzzy, but it wasn't fake. She'd forced herself to watch it, forced herself to try to look for clues, but her jaw kept clamping shut, her hands clapping over her ears, every time the crucial moment came around. She shouldn't be this squeamish. It was unseemly, unprofessional. But every time she feinted behind him, every time Vriska thrust the unbroken human sword through his back, something in her just shut down.

Maybe Karkat was right. Maybe she was a fucking awful troll.

That didn't matter. She was the only legislacerator left, even if she hadn't technically been one to begin with, and she would see this trial through.

Which meant that there was something she needed.

There were special rules for hanging, but the lynching of a murderer was another matter entirely, a matter of solemn ceremony. She couldn't use just any rope from the local hardware store for this; she was going to have to find something special. And she knew just where to look.

There were locks on the cabinets, but they were cheap and human-made, almost afterthoughts; she hadn't thought anyone would want to steal these. She sniffed a little, at the dark, dusty iron of old human blood; There was just the faintest trace of them still left-- just a bit of ink and tea, of grass and gunpowder, of cake and ozone, and-- maybe she was just imagining it-- of magma and cherry-apple-candy.

It didn't make sense. But here this was, and there he was; the evidence was incontrovertible.

 _Logic_ , she thought, and laughed; logic hadn't applied to her life for months and months now.

"hi."

Terezi turned, sharply; then she relaxed. It was Aradia; she was safe with Aradia, who'd killed Vriska once herself, who'd given the coolkid his element.

GC: H3LLO.  
GC: WH4T 4R3 YOU DO1NG UP H3R3?   
AA: the usual  
AA: knew I had to to fix up the timeline    
GC: OH. FROM TH3 FUTUR3, TH3N?   
AA: yeah  
AA: i know its awkward but you mentioned a conversation  
AA: which i knew i hadnt had  
AA: =(   
GC: SO YOU KNOW WH4T'S GO1NG TO H4PP3N?   
AA: tomorrow?  
AA: yeah  
AA: i cant tell you though  
AA: i just had to come to stabilize the time loop.  
AA: offshoot timelines arent allowed anymore   
GC: "OFFSHOOT T1M3L1N3S"?   
AA: like the ones that made us possible actually!  
AA: things like paradoxes and uncaused events  
AA: those were only possible because sburb was messing with the foundations of the universe  
AA: now its gone were back to the natural laws again  
AA: loops are okay  
AA: grandfather paradox isnt, you cant undo something that you wouldnt be able to go back in time without  
AA: and theres only so many loops you can have at a time too  
AA: no more million aradiabots  
AA: but thats 0k  
AA: i mean okay  
AA: i didnt like being a robot  
AA: equius isnt really good at programming emotions  
AA: and he didnt understand me at all.   
GC: WHY 4R3 YOU T3LL1NG M3 4LL TH1S?   
AA: because it came up  
AA: and because i need to  
AA: for tomorrow   
GC: ?   
AA: you know i cant say =(  
AA: youve been talking to him for a while huh?   
GC: Y34H.  
GC: 1 W4RN3D H1M 4W4Y.   
AA: thank you! =)  
AA: i always liked him  
AA: he was a bit of an asshole to me sometimes  
AA: but they were crappy circumstances  
AA: that brought out the worst in all of us  
AA: and the best in only a few.  
AA: it brought out the best in him.

Terezi shivered; she didn't like this. Sure, Aradia could be creepy, even now that she was mostly okay; but something about this...

GC: W3'R3 F1N4LLY GO1NG TO G3T TH4T B1TCH.   
AA: also good =)  
AA: mostly i settled my scores with her when i beat her to death but this...  
AA: this is inexcusable  
AA: and she knows it  
AA: she wants to be remorseless because thats how were supposed to be  
AA: but we have a choice now   
GC: YOU KNOW, 1 K33P G3TT1NG 4SK3D TH1S QU3ST1ON, 4ND SOM3HOW 1 N3V3R THOUGHT TO 4SK YOU.  
GC: 4ND H3 N3V3R 3V3N 4SK3D M3 TO 4SK YOU.  
GC: WHY D1DN'T YOU STOP HER?   
AA: because i couldnt   
GC: D1D YOU TRY?   
AA: thats how i found out about the grandfather-paradox rule  
AA: by the time i heard they were all gone  
AA: if i hadnt heard they were all gone i wouldnt have gone back in time to stop her  
AA: so that wasnt allowed   
GC: TH4T'S 4 D4MN3D SH4M3.   
AA: yeah   
GC: BUT WH4T 4BOUT S1NC3 TH3N?   
AA: i tried  
AA: i couldnt  
AA: but thats the conversation we had to have tonight   
GC: YOU COULDN'T?   
AA: im sorry =(  
AA: ill see you tomorrow terezi  
AA: happy plaiting!

Terezi wanted to say something else, but Aradia disappeared in a flash of red. Metal-raspberry-ashes... they were so similar, even though they had no right to be, even though they were so different.

What would the coolkid have been like as a troll, she suddenly wondered? What color would his blood have been, what would he have wanted to be? What would they have been like raised human?

 _Too late_ , she thought, that sense of uneasiness, of doom, still upon her. _Impossible, and too late..._

Besides; that was all theoretical, and theoretical things didn't matter. What mattered to her was justice.

If she didn't sleep tonight, it would simply be in pursuit of her calling.

\--

There was a meeting called for today. She could've captchalogued the rope, to keep it hidden out of sight, to keep her intentions secret for just a while longer, but she wanted it close at hand... and besides, she wasn't finished plaiting yet. Just a couple feet to go.

"NO WAY EQUIUS IS GONNA SHOW UP. HE NEVER SHOWS UP, AND AFTER THIS, LIKE FUCK HE'S GOING TO SHOW HIS SWEATY NOOKLICKER FACE. HE'LL KEEP NEPETA AWAY TOO, IF HE'S NOT ANGRY WITH HER OVER... THAT THING THAT APPARENTLY HAPPENED DESPITE ALL LOGIC... ACTUALLY EITHER WAY HE'S KEEPING HER, IT'S FUCKING CREEPY AND I'M AN ASSHOLE FOR NOT PAYING ANY ATTENTION TO HER."

GC:TH4T L34V3S S1X.  
GC: P3RF3CT. >:]

"PERFECT? PERFECT FOR..." Karkat looked down, at the neat braid she was making, and gaped. "WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?!" he hissed at her, with genuine alarm.

GC: M4K1NG 4 ROP3.  
GC: DON'T YOU P4Y 4TT3NT1ON TO L3G4L POL1CY?  
GC: 1T'S 4 M4TT3R OF PROC3DUR3 1N MURD3R C4S3S.

"WHAT THE FUCK-- TEREZI, FOR FUCK'S SAKE, YOU CAN'T FUCKING PROSECUTE VRISKA SERKET!!"

GC: W4TCH M3.

"WATCH YOU DIE? NO FUCKING THANKS, I THINK I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF THAT TO LAST ME A LIFETIME OR THREE-- WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU THINKING?! ARE YOU THINKING?! DID SOMETHING IN YOUR TWISTED LITTLE HEAD FINALLY SNAP?!"

GC: MY GOD, 4R3 YOU 4 CH4RM3R.  
GC: YOU MUST H4V3 4LL TH3 4DM1R3RS.  
GC: 4LL OF TH3M.

"I DON'T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT THAT, I JUST WANT YOU NOT TO DO YOUR BEST TO GET VRISKA TO GET ALL BARD OF RAGE ON YOUR INTERNAL ORGANS!!"

GC: WH4T, YOU TH1NK 1 DON'T C4R3 4BOUT YOU?  
GC: SUCH 4 CH4RM3R.

"GOD DAMN IT, TEREZI!! I HATE THIS, I HATE HER, I HATE THAT THEY'RE DEAD, BUT THE ONLY THING THAT COULD MAKE THIS EVEN FUCKING WORSE IS YOU BEING DEAD TOO!!!"

She just looked up at him, with a faint smile. Almost sweet of him; really; he just didn't understand, and she couldn't explain. But it would be clear soon enough.

No more million Aradiabots. No more duplicates. Not another doomed-timeline kid, then. So how had he faked it?

"Oh, I Recognize This," said Kanaya, settling down across the table, a vague smile on her face. "How Lovely. Will There Be A Traditional Food-Slinging Ceremony After The Lynching, As Tradition Dictates?"

GC: 1'M SUR3 TH4T C4N B3 4RR4NG3D.  
GC: 1 D1DN'T KNOW YOU W3R3 SO KNOWL3DG34BL3, K4N4Y4! >:]

"I Realized A Long Time Ago That She Might End Her Life On The End Of A Rope," she said. "Back Then I Was Not Hoping For It, But I Thought Attaining An Expertise In The Ceremonial Rites Might Be Advantageous Nonetheless."

But it hadn't smelled fake. Wouldn't she have known a fake when she saw it? Hadn't she always before?

"Hello-- wait, is that a rope?" said Aradia. "I didnt know todays meeting was going to be this exciting!"

GC: 1 TR13D TO W4RN YOU, BUT 1T TURN3D OUT TO B3 YOU FROM TH3 FUTUR3.  
GC: JUST SO YOU KNOW. YOU S41D SOME3TH1NG 4BOUT T1M3L1N3S B31NG 1MPORT4NT NOW.

"Oh, yes, they are! i never told you that, did i? guess im going to have to go back and explain it to you then!"

"WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU ALL SO GODDAMN CALM ABOUT THIS?!" Karkat yelled. "SHE'S GOING TO GET HER STUPID PSYCHO CANE-HAPPY ASS KILLED!!"

"dude," said Sollux, walking in with Feferi, "it's n0t like that's anything new 0r anything. she can handle herself fine."

"What's got you seaing red today, Karcrab?" Feferi giggled.

"WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?!?!"

"May8e they just don't know me like you do."

And there she was, finally, the troll of the hour, their Glorious Unofficial Leader, grinning down at her with that poison-sweet, blueberry-tang grin. "Look who's 8een 8reaking and entering. Is that proper 8eh8vior for a legislacer8or?"

"R3QU1S1T1ON1NG 3V1D3NC3 1S 1ND33D," said Terezi. Her voice was quiet, and hoarse as the grave, but she'd been training; she had enough of a voice to get through this. "YOU KNOW TH3 C3R3MON14L NOOS3 H4S TO B3 SP3C14L. 1T H4S TO B3 R3PR3S3NT4T1V3 OF TH3 D3F3ND4NT'S CR1M3S. WH4T 3LS3 COULD 1 POSS1BLY US3?"

"Oh, this should be entert8ning," laughed Vriska. "Fine, tear my trophies apart, I was never attached to them anyway. That's a cute little rope you've got there. How's this go again? Oh yeah, first you present the c8se."

She dared lecture Terezi on matters of court? She stood, outwardly unruffled, but her blod boiling with approproate prosecurorial vigor. "VR1SK4 S3RK3T. 1 4CCUS3 YOU OF TH3 FOLLOW1NG CR1M3S. 1 4CCUS3 YOU OF V1OL3NC3 UNW4RR4NT3D 4GA1NST THOS3 OF 3QU4L OR H1GH3R BLOOD. 1 4CCUS3 YOU OF BR34CH OF CONTR4CT AND B3TR4Y4L W1THOUT GROUNDS. 1 4CCUS3 YOU OF UNPR3C3D3NT3D 4ND UNL4WFUL G3NOC1DE W1THOUT DU3 PROC3SS OF L4W. WH4T S4Y YOU, WH3N CONFRONT3D W1TH YOUR CR1MES?"

Vriska just laughed. "You can't pin the violence on me, the contracts were never signed, and there was no one to petition to get the genocide cleared! Do you really think they would've given a shit?"

"PROB4BLY NOT. TH3Y WOULD 4LSO NOT H4V3 C4R3D 4BOUT TH3 T3CHN1C4L1TY YOU C1T3." Terezi circled, slowly, twisting the rope in her hands.

"Point to the 8lind girl," Vriska laughed again, utterly unconcerned. Terezi wasn't frazzled; soon she'd understand. "Doesn't matter. This isn't a court. There isn't a judge--"

"H4D YOU STUD13D TH3 L4WS YOU SO FL4GR4NTLY BR34K, YOU WOULD KNOW TH4T TH3R3 4R3 4LLOW4NC3S FOR SP3C14L C1RCUMST4NC3S. P4RT1CUL4RLY 1N C4S3S-- OF MURD3R." Terezi grinned; she lived for this. Finally, finally, a witness who would talk back-- a criminal with a neck the noose would snap.

"Terezi, Terezi, Terezi." Vriska shook her head. "I h8 to see you fall this far. Finally admitting it, aren't we?"

"4DM1TT1NG WH4T?"

"A murder case has to have a victimized party. Everyone else I killed has 8een dead for 8ges. There's 8een whispers, Terezi. We're all _worried_ a8out you. We know what you 8elieve. "

Vriska leaned in, with a grin of sharp teeth. " _You actually 8elieve he's alive._ "

Terezi tilted her head. "4ND?"

Vriska shook her head, the perfect display of stunned incredulity. "And he's dead, Terezi! I killed him myself! You're making ropes out of his 8loodstained clothes! I knew I 8eat the shit out of you in the t8keover, 8ut I didn't think I'd damaged your _8rain_! "

"SO YOU 4LL3G3 M3NT4L 1NST4B1L1TY," said Terezi, not rattled. It was an interesting argument, if a moot one. Then again, Vriska didn't seriously believe she was on trial yet. She'd learn. She would learn.

"Well, duh!!!!!!!! You've 8een pestering a dead 8oy! Let me present the facts."

And Vriska was circling, now; Terezi felt a taste of her power pressing against her skin. Not enough to take over, but an _influence_ , and her stomach flipped at the stench of it, just as it always had.

"D8ve Strider is dead. 8ut you've 8een messaging him for months. You claim he's 8een trying to kill us-- yes, Karkat, I heard your convers8tions, shut your goddamn hole-- and yet somehow, this 'Coolk1d" of yours, this super human who 8ested even me, hasn't landed a 8low on any of them. No one's seen him. No one's heard of him. He hasn't affected a single thing. The kid who was in every 8ulge and nook of his goddamn session! Knight of fucking Time, and here I am, alive and well!!!!!!!!"

She spread her arms out wide, the picture of innocence; she knew that they believed her, and she understood why. For a moment, she even entertained the idea herself. _The messages would all have been delusions. The information I got from him nothing but what I'd guessed and overheard. When I see him come though those doors, it will be because I've finally snapped--_

"She's fucking psychotic," said Vriska. "I know you think I'm dangerous, 8ut she's fucking hallucinating! Can you give me one reason we shouldn't lock her away??"

"SURE," said Karkat, brusque and unafraid; she hadn't expected him to find his courage again, but there it was. "WE DIDN'T LOCK UP GAMZEE FUCKING MAKARA. CASE CLOSED."

"And because she's Te-ray-sea!" Feferi chimed in, full of the blind stupid faith that was the only reason they were alive.

"and because she's never killed any 0f us," said Sollux, ironic as hell, with an echo of old bitterness, but still surprisingly fond.

"aND BECAUSE, SHE'S NOT A LIAR," said Tavros, and Terezi raised her eyebrows; he'd come in behind Vriska, he'd been so omnipresent behind her the past few months that she hadn't even noticed until now. Had he gotten his voice back at last?

"And Because You Are A Traitor," said Kanaya, with the voice of someone who had learned that a long time ago.

"and because shes telling the truth," said Aradia, very quiet.

Terezi grinned. "1N C4S3S 3XTR4ORD1N4RY, 4 P4N3L OF S1X JURORS FROM THROUGHOUT TH3 H3MOSP3CTRUM M4Y B3 4PPO1NT3D TO H34R TH3 M3R1TS OF 4 C4S3, 4ND TH31R JUDGM3NTS UPH3LD W1TH TH3 FULL W31GHT OF TH3 L4W. TH1S 1S 4 C4S3 3XTR4ORD1N4RY, VR1SK4 S3RK3T, 4ND 4 JURY F41R 4ND B4L4NC3D H4S FOUND YOU GU1LTY. W1LL YOU F4C3 YOUR S3NT3NC3?"

The taste of nervousness! Terezi savored it, listening to Vriska swallow. "You're going to listen to the-- fine! Whatever. A sentence requires a wronged party, doesn't it?! Where the fuck are you going to find that?!?!?!?!"

"Dude, step outside, you'll be tripping over the fuckers," said the Coolkid, and her grin almost split her face.

Justice at last.

"WHAT THE FUCK??" Karkat jumped back, knocking into the table.

"W--" Vriska was staring. "Oh, you went 8ll out, Ter8zi, where'd you find some loser to f8ke--"

He whipped out a sword from his sylladex-- a broken scarlet sword, his session's ultimate weapon. No one else could have it. No one else could even touch its blade. "Like anyone could fake this coolness, it fucking kills you being this ice cold. I'm the genuine fucking article, bitch, and it's time for round two."

"I-- I--" Vriska gaped; it was so delicious watching her lost for words that she could almost ignore that nagging goddamn question-- "I fucking killed you!!!!!!!! Don't try to t8ll me I didn't, I was fucking there, I watched you 8leed, I watched you die, I KNOW DE8TH WHEN I S8E IT!!!!!!!!"

He raised his sword; casually examined the glint of the light off the blade. The silence was thick as cotton through the room, but he just let it sit, and sit, until she thought she was going to go insane from it herself.

"Yeah," he said, finally, "you killed me, all right. There's just one problem, Vriska."

He raised his sword. " _I killed you first._ "

She didn't understand.

And then, suddenly, she did.

Terezi's throat felt tight. A touch of feathers, a touch of mercury, tainted the cherry-iron-ash as the coolest of kids flew at his target with ridiculous grace, the kind of smoothness that shouldn't even be real, just didn't happen.

"when you contacted him," said Aradia, quietly, sadly, "you created the one branching point in the timeline. he had time before she arrived. in our art, that means everything."

"M8ke some fucking sense, douche8ag!!!!!!!!" Vriska screamed; she wasn't going down without a fight, Terezi could hear the clink of her dice coming out. But that wasn't going to help her, not this time.

"he couldnt go back, not without changing the events that caused you to contact him in the first place. like i said, that form of paradox isnt permitted anymore. and by the time of the decision point, it was too late."

"Bluh, bluh, bored now," said Dave, masked by the blue-- he'd flipped behind her, now. Earth's sky could be that shade of blue, sometimes, Terezi thought, somehow not paying proper attention to the moment; she didn't know why. Earth's sky could be that shade of blue, and Vriska had taken it as a sign.

"but he could go forward, which made his escape just about inevitable. this allowed his future timeline to come back and affect the past, starting at that decision point."

"8ored?" Vriska echoed, in her most dangerous hiss. "Well, let's see what we can to to entertain you!!!!!!!!"

Sky flared, fire feinted, metal screeched on stone. "Let's t8ke this outside, motherfucker!!!!!!!! Killing you again will be the 8est fun I have all week!!!!!!!!!"

"Shit, allow me," said Dave, and the plate-glass window shattered. There was a tree that direction, Terezi remembered, huge by Earth standards, tall enough; how considerate, she wouldn't have to lug the body far.

"so his future self appeared, one who had killed vriska already," Aradia continued. She might not be as emotionless as her robot used to be, but she was just as implacable sometimes; Terezi wished she would just shut up. "even her loaded dice fail, and hes hardly a novice at the art of war; there had to be timelines in which he would, and nothing could stop him from coming back. besides... loops are still permissible."

"WHAT THE FUCK, SO WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU SAYING, DAMN IT?" Karkat demanded; she didn't know how he wasn't getting it. It all seemed devastatingly simple to her; she should've figured it out ages ago. "THIS GODDAMN TIME BULLSHIT GIVES ME A HEADACHE. SPIT IT OUT ALREADY!"

"its just like he said," she said, sounding terribly sad, as sad as Terezi had ever heard her, just about the way Terezi felt herself. "she killed him. but she killed him after he had already killed her. she can't escape it now. luck means nothing. she cant survive without causing a paradox."

"1T M34NS H3'S GO1NG TO K1LL H3R," she said raspily, staring out the window; she was moving toward it, though she didn't know why she bothered.

"BUT THAT'S CHEA--"

"H3'S GO1NG TO K1LL H3R, 4ND TH3N H3'S GO1NG TO GO B4CK SO SH3 C4N K1LL H1M."

Karkat was stunned into silence; Aradia bowed her head, and she thought she might have caught the scent of tears. Kanaya gasped, Tavros sobbed, Feferi quietly cried out, and Sollux didn't say anything at all. Terezi didn't care; she was pressed against the windowsill, absentmindedly knocking shards of glass out in the courtyard.

God, but he was beautiful in motion like this. There was some grace to troll battle-styles, to be sure, but overall it was a rare quality compared to pure cutthroat brutality. And there was a harsh edge to him, to be sure, that left his style not totally removed from an Alternian, but still, he fucking _danced_. Every move flowed with a smooth certainty, hit or miss, a graceful flourish that could've been born of self-conscious dignity or simply could've been natural to the boy.

A fair fight, this time, and fuck Vriska's luck, fuck time shenanigans, Terezi believed he would've won it no matter what. He was dancing rings around her, dodging 3/4 of her attacks-- they were talking, but she couldn't make out most of the words, not from this far. "What did you tell him?" she thought she heard. "How did you explain that you were going back on every fucking word you ever said?"

She spat something back-- 8lood, pathetic, what it took to survive, and swung, knocking him back, but only for a moment.

Another feint, and then he was behind her, and his sword slipped into her back. He was saying something, she knew he was saying something, but she still couldn't make it out; she thought she might've heard her whisper something in reply before he let her go, jerking the sword back roughly, letting her crumple to the ground.

He turned around, and looked at her; one of her hands gripped the windowsill tight, while the other slowly raised her phone.

GC: DON'T GO.

He raised a hand to his shades, let it drop down again, his shoulders sagging, his blade still at the ready.

TG: come on rez  
TG: what am i supposed to do stay here till im 80  
TG: thatd fill the time loop just fine  
TG: what do you mean whats wrong with me vriska my back just hurts and i dyed my hair white and im wearing a mask  
TG: its a human welcome home thing  
TG: you gonna stab me or not  
TG: not gonna work  
TG: shit im hitting fucking puberty i grew two inches in the last month  
TG: im lucky if i got another month before im michael jordan  
TG: except whiter and more badass  
TG: well okay there was space jam  
TG: john loved that piece of shit movie  
TG: fucking cartoon characters and chaos dunks  
TG: is there a troll michael jordan

She shook her head; her hands were shaking.

GC: DON'T GO.

TG: aw fuck  
TG: see this is why i didnt tell you  
TG: if you had time to prepare you mightve locked me in the fucking dungeon or something  
TG: fuck time and space youd knock me over the head and sit on me  
TG: chain me to a bed and make me lay down sick beats  
TG: misery except with less kathy bates and more dope rhymes  
TG: is there a troll kathy bates  
TG: ...ok of course youre not going to answer that  
TG: its a stupid question and im just talking like a fucking moron because  
TG: im still scared  
TG: but heres the thing  
TG: aradia told me once  
TG: or maybe a lot ot times technically look english doesnt really work with our gig  
TG: doesnt matter when or where or how many times  
TG: point is she told me that with our gig  
TG: weve gotta learn to deal with dying  
TG: because were gonna do it a lot  
TG: and holy shit did we  
TG: again and again and again and again and in a way im still not really okay with that  
TG: but more like it was bullshit that it had to be that way at all  
TG: it took me a long time  
TG: which luckily i had of course ha ha  
TG: but finally i figured out  
TG: theres shit im okay with dying for  
TG: of course i died for a lot of pointless shit too and that kind of bugged me  
TG: but some things  
TG: some things are worth it  
TG: if i couldve killed myself to save them i wouldnt even blink anymore  
TG: even knowing this is my last chance  
TG: no more spare daves exploring the mysteries of space and time in death bubbles or whatever  
TG: but even if i cant save them  
TG: im fixing a lot of other shit here i know it for sure  
TG: ive been doing more than chasing after wizards and juggalos and pirates youll see  
TG: youre gonna be okay  
TG: and earths gonna be okay  
TG: and im gonna be okay really  
TG: not that it even really matters  
TG: this is how its got to be  
TG: is this making any goddamn sense at all

It did, of course, that was the whole fucking problem, but she wasn't going to tell him that.

GC: pl34s3.  
GC: st4y.   
TG: oh for fucks sake  
TG: i fucking cant   
GC: 1 know  
GC: 1 just  
GC: 1t's not f41r  
GC: 1t's not just  
GC: 1t n3v3r should h4v3 h4pp3n3d  
GC: 4nd you shouldn't h4v3 to do th1s.  
GC: 4nd 1t's not your f4ult 4nd th3r3's noth1ng you c4n do 4nd th1s 1s prob4bly just m4k1ng 3v3ryth1ng 3v3n worse  
GC: 4nd 1'm sorry for th4t but  
GC: 1t hurts  
GC: 1t shouldn't but 1t do3s   
TG: yeah i know  
TG: hey look at it this way  
TG: maybe ive fucked up and youll be first against the wall when the revolution comes   
GC: h3h3  
GC: not 4 fuck1ng ch4nc3    
TG: still we all gotta go sometime  
TG: so how about you set things straight in this shithole  
TG: and me and my thousand dead selves will treat you to some ill beats when youre done   
GC: 1t's 4 dat3. >:]   
TG: ready to kick some ass then   
GC: YOU'D B3TT3R B3L13V3 1T, COOLK1D.   
TG: oh i do  
TG: thanks for everything you crazy bitch   
GC: >:]  
GC: S4M3 TO YOU, YOU 1NSUFF3R4BL3 PR1CK.   
TG: heh  
TG: see you on the flip side terezi   
GC: GOODBY3, D4V3.

It was a lie, of course; she was an accomplished liar. She wasn't okay with this at all. She was still hurt and scared and fucking furious, but what good would come of telling him that? It wouldn't stop him, it wouldn't change anything. It was all already decided and she didn't have a say at all.

But it was fucking _brave_. He drew his timetables from his sylladex with practiced ease, honey-smooth, even now; and he went to meet his death, with what was very nearly a fucking pirouette.

Cherry and iron and ash; there was silence, still, behind her.

Just one death. Not even a troll. This was nothing by Alternian standards. It shouldn't be doing this to her.

...But that was philosophy, and Terezi was nothing if not practical.

She felt Karkat step closer behind her; he probably meant well, but she didn't care right now, couldn't cope, so she jumped over the windowsill, rope in hand. The last duty of the legislacerator: to make certain of the criminal's death.

It wasn't justice. It never had been; she understood that now.

But it was going to be.

\--

 _if crimes you've committed  
enjoy what you're given  
for no one escapes them  
their shadow will fall.  
sooner or later  
legislacerators  
bring death to the guilty  
and justice for all._

-*-


	2. DVD Commentary edition!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nextian asked for a commentary on this. I couldn't possibly refuse. Hopefully no one involved regrets it. :D

> **So I tend to wind up with two kinds of fic. The first kind, most of them, I look at, remind myself that the three people who read it said it was VERY good, and then try to stop being so entitled. And maybe learn to summarize.**
> 
>  **This would be the other kind.**

-*-

 _this world is a cold one  
the evil and bold ones  
betray all their oaths and  
escape to the dark.  
their own fires burn them  
if they don't abjure them  
they'll find that they're left with  
a permanent mark._  
- _A Poem Extolling the Many Virtues of the Legislacerators, Particularly Their Dogged And Determined Nature And Their Passion For Avenging Crimes_ , unknown/Traditional

> **I recall remembering only at the last minute that Troll titles were _really frickin' long_. Why I wound up writing a poem for it in the first place is pretty much lost to the darkness of history. I think it was just an odd stroke of inspiration.**

-*-

You could call Vriska many things, and oh yes, they'd all been tried; but not even the most ardent kismesis could deny that she was good at what she did.

Exactly what the fuck it was she did, Terezi had never been sure. It'd seemed reasonable at first, natural troll behavior, but as time wore on, her goals had become more and more hazy-- haphazard, even, cobbled-together. Terezi blamed that twisted bitch of a lusus, but that hardly mattered anymore. It was far too late for redemption.

And by the time Terezi finally saw through scheme and counterscheme and wild distraction, well-- it was far too late for that, too.

> **Vriska is goddamn complicated. This was written back when her quasi-face-turn was only just beginning; but honestly, I still don't see Vriska as someone who understands what she's doing, what she wants. I think she has pretty good _reasons_ for that, mind you; I think just not thinking and going for it was a survival mechanism for her. And yes, clearly she can plot the hell out of something short-term. Long-term, though-- true goals, actual motivations-- she is really, really used to not thinking about that, and I'm not sure she'll ever recover.**

Her blood cried for justice within her, said that Vriska had evaded it for far too long, and fuck yes, she agreed; but she'd been boxed neatly into a corner and time wasn't on her side. She'd figured it out too late; there was only one thing she could even try to do.

> **Since she is placed in contrast to Vriska, it is really easy to forget that Terezi is also goddamn complicated. We tend to be fooled, I think, by the fact that she stood up for what was right, and forget that her actual conception of "right" is not as simple or (debatably, of course) accurate as we'd like to assume.**

She booted up Trollian, tapping her fingers impatiently as it burrowed through proxy after proxy, evading Sollux's firewalls and Vriska's monitoring. Finally, the connection was clear and secure, even if it was probably too late.

Maybe he'd still listen to her, maybe he wouldn't, maybe it wouldn't help if he did; but justice demanded she try.

COOLK1D, she typed.

RUN.

NOW.

If anyone in the world could manage it, it would be him.

> **You know, I'm not at all sure if I even ship Dave/Terezi.**
> 
>  **Sometimes I'm really not very normal at all.**

\--

Terezi was surprised, for a moment, that she'd been left alive, before she remembered that Vriska had always been overconfident that way. She'd want her as a pet, to keep around and laugh at, to watch like a fish in a bowl as it uselessly, prettily schemed against you. Vriska was okay with having people to rule over, unlike other lusus-fucking bulgelickers she could name. She took pleasure in at least fucking with you before you died. Terezi wasn't really sure, on the whole, which was worse.

> **There are also possibly other motivations, more Freudian urges toward subconscious self-ruination. Luckily, I am writing as Terezi and don't yet have to think as hard about that.**

Her throat hurt like hell, her teeth were seared to nubs; the rules that always brought them back before were broken and death had a bitterer taste. She'd tried to take her voice, Vriska had, and she might've succeeded. So what did that leave her with?

> **Note that I am vague as to what those were. At least I had that much foresight. XD And with Hussie, there are always new ways to come back.**

There was a buzz beside her-- she'd been left with her new phone, too, how merciful. She flipped open the still-unfamiliar lid, pressed the tip of her tongue to the screen-- and tasted cherry and iron and ash, jolting straight through her spine, jerking her away before she could even try to discern the words.

It had worked? If something had gone right, it would be the first time in weeks-- had it not even been weeks since this bullshit began? Or had it been happening her whole life?

But that was philosophy, and Terezi believed in the practical. She pressed her lips to the screen again, closing her eyes to concentrate even if that made no physical sense anymore.

TG: so i never talked with all of you  
TG: and theres something i need to know  
TG: it seems like theres a couple of you who arent total fucking wastes of space  
TG: and you should probably give me a list  
TG: of anyone you dont wanna see dead  
TG: which maybe ill pay attention to i dont know  
TG: but know this for fucking sure  
TG: i am killing her  
TG: and that harry potter douche  
TG: and that juggalo freak  
TG: and anyone who stands in my way  
TG: you like justice  
TG: make sure the wrong people dont stand in my way  
TG: giant robot catch you later   
\--turntechGodhead has disconnected--

Well. Maybe there were a couple of miracles left, after all.

> **Turns out Dave would probably know their names. But he's not feeling particularly respectful right now.**

\--

There was a human conceit called "mercy". It was a confusing concept, and Terezi wanted no part of it. He'd come after her, too; he had no reason not to. And while she would defend herself to the best of her ability, she was really okay with however that contest might turn out. Risking death was part of a legislacerator's job description. Actually, fuck that; risking death was part of being born a troll.

Still, from the way he talked... he might actually be buying into the stupid idea. Maybe it was just a game, cat-and-mouse, bait-and-switch, but... damn it, it was so hard to remember sometimes that these people were aliens, and they didn't think like normal people at all.

Well, it didn't matter. Whether it was a game or it was one of the few sincere things the coolkid had ever said to her, it called for the same response.

GC: 1 4M GO1NG TO DO TH1S PROP3RLY, COOLK1D.  
GC: FULL COURTROOM R3G4L14. DU3 PROC3SS.  
GC: 1 4M NOT US3D TO TH1S TYP3 OF D3F3NS3, BUT 3V3N TH3 MOST 4V1D L3G1SL4C3R4TOR S3L3CTS H3R WRONGDO3RS PR3C1S3LY.  
GC: B3S1D3S, YOU'R3 GO1NG TO B3 V3RY BUSY. L3T'S B3 3FF1C13NT.  
GC: YOUR HONOR4BL3 TYR4NNY, TH3 F1RST WHOM 1 PR3S3NT TO TH3 COURT 4S NOT QU1T3 WORTHY OF YOUR T1M3 1S...  
GC: K4RK4T V4NT4S.   


> **Whether or not those wrongdoers are always selected on the basis of being guilty of a particular offence, I wouldn't care to wager on.**

  
TG: who the fuck is that  
TG: and "your honorable tyrrany" what the fuck  
TG: you people really call judges that   
GC: YOU DON'T?  
GC: 1 4SSUM3D TH4T'S WH4T "YOUR HONOR" W4S SHORT FOR.  
GC: THOUGH NO LEG1SL4C3R4TOR WOULD D4R3 SHOW SUCH 1MPUD3NC3 TO TH3 PR3S1D1NG JUDG3.   
TG: let me guess  
TG: or they eat you   
GC: *G4SP*!!  
GC: HOW D1D YOU KNOW??   


> **Also not wagering on the level of sarcasm there.**

  
TG: think im kinda getting a grip on troll society  
TG: everything in the whole fucking world will kill you  
TG: getting more of an idea of what that shit must be like   


> **I have been slow to take to the trolls, as it were. I was reminding myself too.**

  
GC: 4NYW4Y, K4RK4T W4S OUR L34D3R.  
GC: TH3 GR4Y-T3XT ON3? W1TH TH3 S1CKL3 4ND TH3 CH3RRY-R3D BLOOD?   
TG: oh yeah that douchebag  
TG: he was okay  
TG: is he with the hellbitch   
GC: H3LL NO.  
GC: SH3 H4S T4K3N H1S POS1T1ON 4S L34D3R. H3 FUCK1NG H4T3S H3R.  
GC: TH4T 4ND SH3 K1LL3D H1S HUM4N R3DROM 1NT3R3ST. H3 COULD WR1T3 4N EP1C BL4CK ROM4NC3.  
GC: 4ND WOULD, BUT SH3 TH1NKS H3'S B3N34TH H3R.   
TG: i dont know what the fuck a black romance is  
TG: and dont fucking tell me  
TG: cause i remember "karkat" tried to once   
GC: H3 DO3S LOV3 TO D1SP3NS3 ROM4NT1C 4DV1C3.   
TG: and ive been dealing with time loops living four days in one  
TG: and i still dont know what the fuck he meant  
TG: and i dont care its all batshit insane  
TG: wait what the fuck is redrom  
TG: DONT TELL ME  
TG: DONT TELL ME  
TG: CHRIST DO I NOT CARE   


> **...Huh. I have made more of a headcanon out of Dave's opinion of troll romance than I thought. XD**

  
GC: 4LL R1GHT, F1N3, R3M41N UN3NL1GHT3N3D.  
GC: NO SK1N OFF MY HORNS.  
GC: BUT 1F 1T H3LPS...  
GC: H3 D1D H1S B3ST.   
TG: it wasnt much   
GC: TRU3.   
TG: couldnt feel so i tried to touch  
TG: told the truth i didnt come to fool you  
TG: fuck im tired   
GC: NOT H3R3 TO FOOL M3? NOW TH3R3'S 4 STR4NG3 CONC3PT.   
TG: and even though it all went wrong  
TG: ill stand before the lord of song  
TG: with nothing on my tongue but  
TG: fuck this bullshit   


> **Not the most famous verse, but I seem to have gotten away with him knowing it. Sometimes I swear I don't know how. XD**

  
TG: car cat huh  
TG: hes kind of a douche  
TG: but if i were killing the douchebags id have to stab myself before i got too far   
GC: 3R1D4N F1RST, THOUGH, SUR3LY.   
TG: fuck yeah i dont hate myself that much  
TG: me and harry potter get in a douche-off i aint lasting ten seconds  
TG: nose to the fucking mat double douche suplex im tapping out  
TG: no man born can beat the prince   
GC: STOP TH4T, YOU'LL G1V3 H1M 4 SW3LL3D H34D.   
TG: heh   
GC: YOU PROB4BLY 4CTU4LLY WOULD. H3 1S TH4T K1ND OF FUCK1NG MORON.  
GC: fuck yes im the best evver dont you fuckin forget it  
GC: im lonely come entertain me you lowwblood fuckwwits  
GC: TH3R3 4R3 F3W CR1M1N4LS WHOS3 D34TH 1 WOULD R4L1SH S331NG MOR3 TH4N H1S.   
TG: a troll among trolls damn  
TG: anyway g2g  
TG: weapons deal   
GC: OOH, N4M3 ON3 4FT3R M3.  
GC: >:]   
TG: sure whatever   
\--turntechGodhead has disconnected--

> **I don't think Eridan is ever not going to be my least favorite. Sure, Equius is blander; and I even have a headcanon that Doc Scratch manipulated Eridan into some of his more spectacular acts of uselessness. Still. Nothanks.**

They felt like lyrics to her, and the search confirmed it. She sat there and listened for a while, listening to the strange slow style, the almost religious tone, trying idly to understand what it must be like to think that way. The feelings seemed muted, and yet-- everything about their world had so much color, and she'd known fire in the coolkid, eager silliness, at least, in that silly grub friend of his. Maybe it wasn't quite a difference of feeling. Maybe it was just that all the stakes were different, wildly different, and those differing priorities left almost nothing the same.

Maybe it was a miracle they could talk to each other at all.

Of course, none of them liked the word "miracle" anymore... and there was the whole issue of the takeover/minor genocide to consider.

"Better", "Worse"-- Terezi didn't care about those things, not really. The only abstract she cared about was justice, and on a practical scale-- well. They'd failed. The kids had succeeded. And managed a much lower death rate, even with alternate timelines and that one kid dying at least twice.

No, they'd lost all rights to this world a long time ago, by every written and unwritten law even Alternia had.

And this was the last law Vriska was going to break.

\--

Karkat hobbled into the room, grumpy as always, but she ignored him; there was a message on her phone.

"WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU EVEN CALLING?" said Karkat, arms folded, glaring at her.

> **Coding these things. Jegus H Chris on a pogo stick.**

"NOW 1'M C4LL1NG YOU, SW33TH34RT," she sent, a grin spreading across her face.

"HILARIOUS," he muttered. "I'M STANDING RIGHT HERE, YOU KNOW."

"1'V3 GOT 4 SL1T THRO4T, YOU KNOW," she shot back, and flipped back to the other window for a moment.

TG: got a sweet new weapon by the way  
TG: finally outclassing those fucking doombots  
TG: who the fuck designed those anyway  
TG: i should probably kill them too   
GC: 1S 1T 4NOTH3R SH1TTY BROK3N SWORD?

"PLEASE. LIKE IT'S REALLY STILL THAT BAD." He paused. "...IS IT?"

"Juzzt 4 b1t," she rasped, and swallowed hard against the pain. She was fully capable of exaggerating such infirmities, and fully intended to, but she couldn't yet-- she could still barely croak, and that once or twice a day.

"...OH. WELL. OKAY THEN." He looked down. "I GUESS YOU CAN KEEP PESTERING ME THEN."

"HOW GR4C1OUS," she typed, and flipped to the other screen.

TG: fuck no it is awesome  
TG: besides there was nothing shitty about my broken swords   
GC: EXC3PT TH31R B31NG BROK3N?   
TG: that just made them better man  
TG: maybe its too deep for your troll brain to understand

"...HE'S STILL DOING IT," said Karkat, and it only took her a second to understand what he didn't want to say.

> **If you ranked the trolls in order of how much they gave a damn about each other, it wouldn't match up exactly with my list of favorites, but the same ones would be on either side.**

"H3 W4S 4LW4YS K1ND OF 4N 1D1OT TH4T W4Y," she answered.

"...I TRIED TELLING HIM," he said, staring out the window.

GC: WH4T? W3 S41D W3 WOULDN'T.

"I KNOW, I KNOW, I JUST-- JEGUS FUCK, YOU'VE SEEN IT. IT'S FUCKING INTOLERABLE, WHAT SHE'S DOING TO HIM. SO YOU KNOW WHAT? FUCK WHAT SHE'LL SAY, FUCK WHAT SHE'LL DO, FUCK HOW HE'LL REACT, I'M FUCKING TELLING HIM."

GC: 4ND WH4T H4PP3N3D?

"JUST WHAT I SHOULD'VE FUCKING EXPECTED WOULD HAPPEN. HE SAID SHE'D TOLD HIM WE'D SAY THAT. HE SAID SHE'D SAID SHE'D TRICKED US ALL AND HE SHOULDN'T BELIEVE US, BECAUSE THIS WAS WHAT SHE'D MADE UP FOR HIM AS SOME SORT OF FUCKING TEST. TO MAKE UP FOR-- FUCK, I DON'T KNOW, THAT TIME HE DIDN'T STAB HER OR WHATEVER. I ASKED IF HE REALLY BELIEVED ANY OF THAT BULLSHIT AND HE SAID HE HAD TO TRY." Karkat rubbed his temples, scowling, voice twisted and pained. "AND THE WORST FUCKING PART IS... IF I HADN'T SEEN IT... I'D PROBABLY FALL FOR THAT FUCKING BAIT MYSELF."

He closed his eyes, looking down, and she thought it was best not to disturb him.

GC: BY TH3 W4Y. 1F YOU'R3 ST1LL 4CC3PT1NG N4M3S?   
TG: sure what the fuck less work   
GC: T4VROS N1TR4M.  
GC: 4d10sTor34dor TO YOU.   


> **He was dead for a while. Kinda still plausible Dave wouldn't know his name.**
> 
>  **...Staying compatible with ongoing canon is kind of an impossible task, triple when Hussie's involved, but I always make a go of it anyway.**

  
TG: oh yeah the worst troll ever  
TG: i was thinking id probably let him off just for being such a failure at trolling  
TG: speaks to a certain basic decency  
TG: and stupidity but fuck ill take what i can get  
TG: he plotting against her   
GC: NO.  
GC: H3'S PL4Y1NG L4PDOG. 1T'S QU1T3 P4TH3T1C.   
TG: then why shouldnt i kick his ass   
GC: B3C4US3 OF WHY H3'S PL4Y1NG L4PDOG.  
GC: TH3 POOR STUP1D FUCK1NG B4ST4RD TH1NKS SH3 M1GHT H4V3 L3T H3R L1V3.   
TG: what  
TG: who  
TG: jade?  
TG: and shes telling him she  
TG: christ  
TG: is there any way  
TG: bitch isnt telling the truth is she

She looked up. "YOU'R3 4BSOLUT3LY SUR3."

"AS IF I COULD FUCKING FORGET." His eyes were still hidden away; she'd lay even odds that he was crying. "I SAW IT. I STILL DO."

GC: NO.   
TG: absolutely fucking sure?   
GC: K4RK4T S4YS SO. H3 S4YS H3 S4W 1T.  
GC: H3 W4S N3V3R 4 L14R, 4ND SUR3 4S FUCK NOT TH1S GOOD OF ON3.   
TG: and what the fuck was he doing huh  
TG: what the fuck was he doing while she died   
GC: D3SP1T3 H1S LONG H1STORY OF H1D1NG FROM 4NYTH1NG BLOODY L1K3 4 COW4RD...  
GC: TH3 BROK3N L3GS B34R OUT H1S STORY TH4T SH3 C4UGHT H1M BY SURPR1S3.  
GC: H3 GOT TH3R3 TOO L4T3. SH3 PL4NNED 1T W3LL.

"YOU MISS HIM, DON'T YOU?"

Terezi's head jerked up. "WHO?" she typed.

"WHAT'S-HIS-NAME, THE RED ONE. THE KNIGHT OF TIME. THE 'COOLK1D'." He shifted his arms again, looking uncomfortable. "EVERYONE KNEW YOU LIKED HIM."

"L1K3 YOU L1K3D H3R?" she shot back, stung.

"I... I DON'T KNOW, IT WAS ONLY A COUPLE FUCKING DAYS, IT FELT LIKE FUCKING YEARS AND REAL ROMANCES... FUCK, I SHOULD TRY TELLING SOLLUX THAT. I DON'T KNOW. I LIKED HER A LOT."

"...Y34H," she sent. "1 DON'T KNOW. 1 L1K3D H1M TOO."

> **I tend to remain ship-agnostic whenever I can. I am wishy-washy that way.**

"...WE'VE GOT TO DO SOMETHING," he said.

TG: not well enough   
\--turntechGodhead has disconnected--

"OH, 1'V3 GOT 4 COUPL3 1RONS 1N TH3 F1R3," she said.

\--

TG: in the pantheon ruled criminal justice system the people are represented by two seperate but equally important groups  
TG: the trolls who investigate warcrimes  
TG: and the badass timeshifters who prosecute the offenders  
TG: these are their stories  
TG: DUN DUN   


> **Dave I don't find complicated as much as I never, ever, _ever_ feel like I get his dialogue clever enough. Ever.**
> 
>  **That's not too bad a conversation-starter, though.**

  
GC: YOU'R3 1N 4 GOOD MOOD. >:]   
TG: why not might as well enjoy what i can  
TG: so whaddaya got for me   
GC: SOLLUX C4PTOR, AKA tw1n4rm3gddons.   
TG: huh dont think i talked to him   


> **Have I mentioned it is totally futile to try to write future-fic in this fandom that actually works with canon?**
> 
>  **Have I mentioned I _can't stop trying anyway_??**

  
GC: H3 THOUGHT TROLL1NG YOU W4S STUP1D.   
TG: ok point for him i guess  
TG: whats he up to  
TG: not oppressing the masses like certain dictatrix bitches i could name   
GC: H3 TH1NKS TH4T'S STUP1D TOO.   
TG: hell yeah nother point for him  
TG: whats he doing to stop it   
GC: W3LL, H3'S NOT DO1NG 4NYTH1NG 4G41NST VR1SK4.  
GC: BUT, TH4T'S B3C34US3 H3'S TOO BUSY TRY1NG TO G3T H1S G1RLFR13ND TO L3T H1M K1LL 3R1D4N.  
GC: YOU'LL BR34K H1S L1TTL3 H34RT 1F YOU G3T TO H1M B3FOR3 H1M.   
TG: killing the potter douchebag thats shit i can get behind  
TG: whys his girlfriend holding him back   
GC: AH, F3F3R1. 4S 3MPR3SS, SH3 F33LS 4 C3RT41N R3SPONS1B1L1TY FOR TH3 FUTUR3 OF OUR R4C3.   


> **She _might_ be the sort of person who would put aside (not so much 'forgive') Eridan's asshattery for the common good. Possibly. I don't feel like I know as much about her as I'd like, in the slightest.**

  
TG: what the fuck empress  
TG: you people have empresses   
GC: OH, Y3S, TH3 UND3RW4T3R RUL1NG CL4SS.  
GC: WOULD YOU L1K3 M3 TO T3LL YOU 4BOUT OUR BLOOD H13R4RCHY?   
TG: fuck no   
GC: SO 1NCUR1OUS. >:[   
TG: dont tell me harry potter is actually a prince   
GC: ONLY OF DOUCH3B4GS, MY FR13ND, ONLY OF DOUCH3B4GS.  
GC: ...H3 1S *K1ND* OF ROY4L, THOUGH.   
TG: great  
TG: am i gonna get my ass charged with regicide   
GC: L1K3 1 S41D...  
GC: MOSTLY, P3OPL3 W1LL B3 4NGRY TH4T YOU B34T TH3M TO 1T.   


> **I get that Eridan _wants_ to have friends. But it is an abstract and ill-defined concept to him, basically boiling down to "people who do what I want". Or, he doesn't want to be friends with anyone; he just wants to have friends. I can understand it abstractly, more than I'd like; but toss in the misogyny and ingratitude and the sheer force with which he jams his own head up his troll orifices, and I just don't have time for it.**

  
TG: you snooze you lose  
TG: i dont give a fuck   
GC: 1ND33D, F1RST COM3 F1RST S3RV3D. >:]  
GC: OH, HUH, 'R3G1C1D3' 1S 4 HUMAN CR1M3.  
GC: 1 SUPPOS3 TH4T M4K3S S3NS3.   
TG: what its not illegal to kill rulers where you come from   
GC: 1F TH3Y C4N'T D3F3ND TH3MS3LV3S, WHY SHOULD TH3Y B3 RUL1NG?   


> **That and I'd imagine any unsuccessful attempt would be punished less by the judicial system and more by instant horrible death.**

  
TG: wait  
TG: is it illegal to kill anybody at all where you come from   
GC: W3LL, T3CHN1C4LLY.   
TG: "technically"   


> **This is a question I try to resolve here, but would love to see something canonical on. What is troll "murder"? What does a legislacerator prosecute? From Terezi's crime-scene behavior, surely some killings are murders, but there seems to be an awful lot of killings every day that go without notice. What are the criteria? By walking out your door, are you basically acknowledging the risk of getting fed to a giant spider and waiving your right to retaliation? What the fuck does troll law look like?**

  
GC: USU4LLY SUCH 4CCOUNTS 4RE S3TTL3D BY SURV1V1NG LUS11, D3P3ND3NTS, F4M1LY, WH4T3V3R 1NT3R3ST3D P4RTY G3TS TH3R3 F1RST.  
GC: 4S SUCH, TH3 COURTS N33D NOT B3 1NVOLV3D.  
GC: USU4LLY, L3G1SL4C3R4TORS AR3 CONC3RN3D W1TH TH3FT 4ND CORRUPT1ON TR14LS.  
GC: TH3R3 1S 4N 4WFUL LOT OF CORRUPT1ON.   
TG: so murders not a crime at all   
GC: T3CHN1C4LLY, 1T 1S.  
GC: BUT 1T 1S 4 R4R3 C4S3 TH4T QU4L1F13S FOR OFF1C14L PROS3CUT1ON.  
GC: TH3 CR1M3 MUST B3 S3V3R3 4ND THOROUGHLY UNW4RR4NT3D.  
GC: FURTH3RMOR3, TH3 V1CT1M'S C1RCL3 OF 4CQU41NT3NC3S MUST H4V3 B33N 1LL3G4LLY B4RR3D FROM S33K1NG PROP3R R3V3NG3 1N SOM3 W4Y.  
GC: 4DD1T1ON4LLY, TH3 PROS3CUTOR MUST B3 CONV1NC3D OF TH3 F41R GROUNDS OF TH3 C4S3, OR SH3 M4Y NOT CHOOS3 TO PROS3CUT3.  
GC: 1 DON'T TH1NK TH3R3'S B33N 4 MURD3R TR14L 1N L1V1NG M3MORY.  
GC: 1T'S SO R4R3 1 N3V3R 3V3N H3LD 4 MOCK S3SS1ON, 1 TH1NK.  
GC: 3V3N 1F 1 COULD B3 4 PROS3CUTOR14L OFF1C3R B4CK HOM3, 1'D N3V3R H4V3 GOTT3N TH3 CH4NC3.   


> **Her mock-trial was a corruption case, which _could_ be an indication that murder cases are rare (or she could just be trying to be realistic); wouldn't troll Law and Order have stuffed everyone with murder proceedings to the gills, if they happened at all?**

  
TG: oh really  
TG: that makes a lot of things make more sense   
GC: >:?   
TG: a severe and unwarranted crime  
TG: that the victims couldnt avenge on their own  
TG: with a perpetrator that the prosecutor is just as eager to see fry  
TG: congratulations terezi  
TG: youre the first troll in however-the-fuck-long to actually prosecute a case of murder   
GC: !!   
TG: holy christ that is fucked up   
GC: COULD YOU STOP W1TH TH3 CULTUR4L 1NS3NS1T1V1TY FOR 4 MOM3NT?  
GC: MY M1ND 1S B31NG BLOWN H3R3 >:O   
TG: really hadnt occured to you huh   
GC: W3LL TH4T 1S CL34RLY 4LL YOUR F4ULT!!  
GC: YOU'VE GOT M3 PL4Y1NG D3F3NS3!!  
GC: NO S4N3 L3G1SL4C3R4TOR WOULD B3 *3L1M1N4T1NG* C4ND1D4T3S FOR PROS3CUT1ON. >:O   


> **Of course, you can't safely base all your deductions about a planet's legal system from the games of a kid.**
> 
>  **The evidence does lean toward the planet being pretty seriously fucked up, though.**

  
TG: well hey up to you  
TG: but i dont have time for a genocide  
TG: even if there are only like twelve of you  
TG: i mean sure im badass enough  
TG: and it might not even be the worst idea in the world  
TG: but fuck it lets be lazy  
TG: not like i got nothing on my plate  
TG: resistances to meet arms to deal robots to slay  
TG: fucking chinese buffet up in here  
TG: were talking lethal MSG  
TG: you gotta move with the flow  
TG: know your limits  
TG: take what you eat and eat what you take  
TG: peg the orange chicken off that mofo moo shus head  
TG: ok the metaphor breaks down here a little  
TG: not doing my best work these days   
GC: 1 TH1NK 1T WOULD H4V3 B33N 4W3SOM3, 1F 1 KN3W WH4T 4 CH1N3S3 BUFF3T W4S. >:[   
TG: well you have the internets  
TG: literally  
TG: all of them  
TG: check it out  
TG: ufo up ahead g2g   
-turntechGodhead has disconnected-

> **Actually, he's probably lying here. I don't care how awesome alien/Sburb technology is, I refuse to believe the geeks haven't set up a shadow-net by now. And Dave would have to know it.**
> 
>  **They're real friends, but it's complicated.**

\--

Technically, she knew, she'd been lying when she said she'd never expected to prosecute a murder trial. She'd dreamed of having Vriska Serket as the victim of her first prosecution for years. It had been a largely hopeless dream, granted-- she was always quite careful about leaving dependents alive, the most brilliant part of her damned lusus's schemes. How did you prosecute a case when all the wronged were dead?

Still, she hadn't quite made the obvious connection. Here, for the first time, coniugatus in familia, coniugatus in amicita, coniugatus in sangua-- joined in family, friendship, and blood, when only one was strictly required. It was the perfect cap to the prosecution she had been building all these years; she could not, and would not, fail.

> **Latin is not the most immediately practical of languages, which is why I suspect most of us who took it try to wedge a little in wherever we can.**

TG: yo   
GC: COOLK1D!!  
GC: MY PULCHR1TUD1NOUS PROS3CUTOR14L PROXY.  
GC: 4ND HOW 4R3 YOU ON THIS LOV3LY 34RTH D4Y?   
TG: man youre really into prosecuting that bitch arent you  
TG: its cool i can get behind that  
TG: anyway ive been planning to assassinate harry potter  
TG: and i was wondering if you had any tips   


> **It'll help if you have a fancy wand, but make damn sure to stick around and see if he's really dead.**
> 
>  **...troll Harry Potter...**

  
GC: HMM, 1 TH1NK 1 L1K3 TH3 ORD3R H3R3.  
GC: 4SC3ND1NG D1FF1CULTY, TO B3 SUR3.   
TG: even though hes a prince or whatever   
GC: 1 R3P34T...  
GC: M41NLY, P3OPL3 W1LL B3 4NGRY YOU B34T TH3M TO 1T.  
GC: L3T M3 RUN DOWN SOM3 CR1M3S OF H1S YOU M4Y NOT B3 AW4R3 OF.  
GC: H3 MURD3R3D TWO OF OUR NUMB3R AFT3R TH3Y ATTEMPT3D TO D1SSU4D3 H1M FROM B3TR4Y1NG US 4LL 4ND G3TT1NG H1S DUMB 4SS K1LLED 1N THE B4RG41N.   
TG: yeah that made the sburb news  
TG: word got around  
TG: even though almost no one there was alive to tell it at that point   
GC: OK4Y TH3N.  
GC: H1S MOST 3GR3G1OUS CR1M3S YOU KNOW.  
GC: TH3R3 4R3 TWO PO1NTS TH4T R3M41N P3RT1N3NT.  
GC: ON3:  
GC: SOLLUX W4NTS TO K1LL H1M N34RLY 4S MUCH 4S YOU DO.   
TG: yeah you mentioned that  
TG: what for   
GC: B3C4US3 H3 KNOCK3D H1M OUT,  
GC: BL1ND3D H1M,  
GC: 4ND TH3N K1LL3D H1S G1RLFR13ND.  
GC: 3V3N 1F 1T W4S T3MPOR4RY. H3 W4S 4 LOT MOR3 OK4Y W1TH 1T B3FOR3 TH1S R3SURRECT1ON 4ND P4NTH3ON BULLSH1T.   
TG: okay makes sense  
TG: still gonna have to get in line though  
TG: whats point two   
GC: 1 W4S G3TT1NG TO TH4T!!  
GC: 1MP4TI3NT PROVOK3R OF PROS3CUT1ON!!  
GC: PO1NT TWO 1S,  
GC: H3 H4S 1NS1ST3D ON HUM4N GU4RDS,  
GC: FOR GOD 4LON3 KNOWS WH4T R34SON,  
GC: WH1CH 1S 1NCR3D1BLY FUCK1NG STUP1D.  
GC: TH1S 1S NOT JUST B3C4US3 TH3 ROBOT GU4RDS 4R3 MOR3 3FF1C13NT.  
GC: 1T 1S B3C4US3 1T 1S 4LL BUT 1MPOSS1BLE FOR 4 S4P13NT B31NG TO B3 N34R H1M FOR MOR3 TH4N F1VE M1NUT3S W1THOUT F33LING TH3 MOST PR1M4L OF BL4CK P4SS1ONS ST1RR1NG UP TH31R SOUL.  
GC: 4ND TH4T'S 3V3N 1F YOU'R3 H1S 3QUAL.  
GC: 1NF3R1OR? 1NTOL3R4BL3.  
GC: SL4V3 R4C3? W3LL.  
GC: 4LL 1'LL S4Y 1S YOU'D B3TT3R HURRY B3FOR3 ON3 OF TH3 GU4RDS FORG3TS TH3 THR34T TO H1S L1FE 4ND F4M1LY 4ND DO3S TH3 D33D H1MS3LF.  
GC: 1T'S 4LL M4L3S, H3 4LW4YS W4S 4 P1G TH4T W4Y...   


> **Did I mention anything about disliking Eridan. XD**

  
TG: wait  
TG: threat to their life and family   
GC: HOW 3LS3 WOULD W3 D4R3 T4K3 HUM4NS 4S GU4RDS?   
TG: goddammit  
TG: got to take care of them then  
TG: makes shit more complicated   
GC: T4K3 C4R3 OF YOURS3LF, MY AW3SOM3 AUX1L14TOR OF JUST1C3.  
GC: YOU H4V3 TO L1VE, SO W3 C4N ST4G3 TH3 TR14L OF TH3 M1LL3N1UM.  
GC: DON'T YOU WORRY. 1 N3V3R LOS3 4 C4S3.   
TG: man if you start getting all ace attorney up in this   
GC: ?   
TG: its a game series  
TG: you know what you should check it out  
TG: get yourself one and say its from me  
TG: you know  
TG: what id get you if i had any money  
TG: or your mail wasnt screened  
TG: or i cared that much   
GC: OOH, S1CK BURN.  
GC: TH3 FL4M3S, TH3Y 4R3 S3TT1NG TH1S PL4C3 4LL ON F1R3.   
TG: youd like it i hear theres a chick with a whip   
GC: TH3 P4L4C3 1GN1T3S W1TH TH3 HOLY FL4M3S OF JUST1C3.  
GC: TH3 UNR1GHT3OUS SCR34M FOR M3RCY 4ND 4R3 4FFORD3D NON3.   
TG: ok thats probably enough   
GC: TH3 BLOOD OF TH3 OFF3ND3RS 1S TH3 ONLY R1V3R TH4T C4N QU3NCH TH3 3T3RN4L FL4M3S.  
GC: TH3 GLOR1OUS HOLY R1V3R OF 4LL TH3 D3L1C1OUS R41NBOW BLOOD TH3R3 1S.  
GC: 4ND 1T MUST FLOW.  
GC: W3 W1LL M4K3 1T FLOW, YOU 4ND 1.  
GC: >:]   
TG: uh  
TG: right  
TG: resistance meeting g2g   
\--turntechGodhead has disconnected--

> **I could not tell you how much of any of that conversation is trolling...**

She smirked; typical human squeamishness. Even he fell victim sometimes. It was nice to know she could still get to him... that she hadn't gone completely soft.

Idly, she looked up the games he'd mentioned; all about these "defense attorneys", such an insult. She was about to dismiss it entirely as an attempt to "get her goat", until she saw that the most recent entry focused on a human prosecutor.

It was worth a shot, she figured, at least to see how angry she should be over the insult when next he called. Besides... it might be interesting to get a taste of human "prosecution". Though it could never measure up to the thrill of the real thing.

\--

GC: OBJ3CT1ON!!!!!!!!!!!!

"OH, FOR FUCK'S SAKE." Karkat dodged agily out of the way of the cane that was lashed at him, despite his still-healing legs; the instinct had come quickly. "COULD YOU PLEASE STOP BEING OBSESSED WITH GAMES FOR STUPID HUMAN GIRLS ALREADY?!"

GC: FOOL1SHLY FOOL1SH FOOL WHO DO3S NOT KNOW OF WH4T H3 SP34KS!!  
GC: YOU H4V3N'T TR13D 1T, SO YOU DON'T UND3RST4ND.  
GC: 1T 1S...  
GC: 4N 4W3SOM3 G4M3.  
GC: M4YB3 TH3 B3ST HUM4N G4M3.  
GC: UNT1L YOU H4V3 TR13D 1T YOU C4N SHUT YOUR FOOL1SH MOUTH. >:]

"I SHOULD FIND THE GUY WHO CAME UP WITH THE STUPID IDEA AND KICK HIS ASS," Karkat muttered, rubbing one of the welts that remained from an unsuccessful attempt at dodging. "A LEGISLACERATOR WITH A WHIP, IT'S LIKE THEY WERE TRYING TO MAKE MY LIFE WORSE."

> **Terezi would gravitate toward Fransiska. She is dedicated to her job and violently fervent in her distain for those who break the law; that is who, is what Terezi wants to be.**
> 
>  **Sooner or later, though, she's going to realize that, in this timeline (perhaps eventually in any?), that's not who she actually is. She saw a little more of the world, encountered the strange but familiar ideology of a friend, and now she is thinking about the law, about her goals and ideals; realizing that though she cannot and will not give up her ideals, she was also fed a lot of false premises, and it's time she grew up and decided for herself what "justice" means. She is Edgeworth, in this game, and she just doesn't know it yet.**
> 
>  **Also, due to this and only this, headcanon? Pre-Scratch Redglare was greatly looking forward to her career as a defense attorney. Then von English comes along and molds her daughterancestor to his own twisted ideals.**

GC: OH, K4RK4T, TH4T 1S WH4T 1S SO SP3C14L 4BOUT YOU.  
GC: WHO 3V3N H4S TO TRY??  
GC: 1T JUST COM3S N4TUR4LLY, L1K3 R1V3RS FLOW TO THE S34, L1K3 BLOOD F4LLS TO TH3 GROUND.  
GC: HOW C4N YOU BL4M3 US FOR FOLLOW1NG TH3 L4WS OF N4TUR3??

"YOU KNOW, I'D ALMOST FUCKING BELIEVE IT," he muttered. "A SPECIAL FUNDAMENTAL FORCE IN THE UNIVERSE, DEDICATED TO MAKING MY LIFE MISERABLE. YOU KNOW WHAT, I THINK YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT. AREN'T YOU BREAKING THAT RULE BY TELLING ME?"

GC: NO, 1 TH1NK YOU'LL B3 JUST 4S M1S3R4BL3 KNOW1NG. >:]  
GC: 4FT3R 4LL, 1T GO3S BOTH W4YS.  
GC: NO M4TT3R WH4T 4NYON3 ELS3 DO3S, YOU'LL F1ND 4 W4Y TO B3 M1S3R4BL3 4NYW4Y.  
GC: SO WHY F1GHT 1T? YOU KNOW YOU LOV3 1T, D33P DOWN.

"IF I DIDN'T KNOW HOW MUCH DYING SUCKED BY NOW, I'D FUCKING SHOOT MYSELF," Karkat grumbled.

GC: YOU S33M P4RT1CUL4RLY ON-3DG3 TOD4Y.  
GC: WH4T 1S 1T?

"NOTHING," Karkat muttered, as usual, folding his arms in a blatantly defensive posture. Clearly there were issues with this witness's testimony.

GC: HOLD 1T!!!

"OH WHAT THE CHRIST."

GC: YOU 4R3 CL34RLY P4RT1CUL4RLY CR4BBY TOD4Y!  
GC: TH1S DO3S NOT M3SH W1TH YOUR T3ST1MONY TH4T NOTH1NG 1S GO1NG ON.

"TESTIMONY? WHAT THE FUCK?"

GC: DO NOT TRY TO FOOL TH3 COURTS, K4RCR4B. >:]  
GC: TH3 TRUTH W1LL OUT.  
GC: HOW3V3R LONG 1T T4K3S. 

"M-Mistress! MISTRESSSS!!"

Terezi jumped; she noticed Karkat folding his arms a little tighter as she turned toward the door. A human voice, obviously running toward Vriska with news-- maybe he'd done it; maybe today had been the day. She checked her phone; no messages.

"What the hell? St8 your 8usiness!!!!!!!!"

Terezi tensed at the sound of her voice, pressing closer toward the door. She noticed that Karkat was too, though he was trying and utterly failing to pretend he didn't care.

"M-Mistress, there's news from San-- New Ampora."

> **In my defense, he totally would.**

"Fucking Eridan. What's that dum8ass doing now?"

"He's-- Mistress, he's dead."

Silence in the hall; a whispered "fuck, yes," from Karkat. Not a surprised 'fuck, yes', either. But how could _he_ have seen this coming?

Her phone chimed; she flipped it open quickly, stopping the sound short.

> **Since I'm trying to be actually kinda informative in this if I can, I actually remember wtiting this pesterlog all in one part, and only deciding to split it up later. Everyone has things that come easier to them, I think; with me, it's dialogue and maybe plot. This leads to. A lot of goddamn pesterlogs. And a general occasional tendency to write lines first and add exposition in between later. XD**

TG: so i was gonna kill hp today  
TG: had the timing all right and everything

"How did it happen?" Vriska asked, voice far too calm. Terezi had heard that there was a human saying, "Don't shoot the messenger". Trolls would agree that shooting was too quick, but she suspected that wasn't what the humans meant.

TG: had this whole fucking plan set out like clockwork  
TG: cause everything i fucking do is that way  
TG: laser-cut and high precision  
TG: thats how time travel is its all got to mesh together  
TG: it looks like theres messy edges sometimes but theres not if youre doing it right  
TG: which is how you gotta do it if you want to come out alive

"Someone-- someone breached his defenses, Mistress. Completely and utterly."

"What the fuck were the 8uards doing?"

"We-- no one can find them, Mistress."

TG: so i had a plan  
TG: got people set up to take care of the guards  
TG: i mean after  
TG: literally take care of  
TG: cause you were right they took one look at his ass getting attacked and were all  
TG: meh  
TG: effort  
TG: whats the worst that can happen  
TG: he gets maimed and we have to cart his hipster ass around  
TG: probably on a fucking litter like goddamn slave boys  
TG: not worth it  
TG: and that part actually worked just fine

"No one can FIND them????!!!! You'd 8etter start looking!!!!!!!!"

"Yes, Mistress, we are, Mistress, but--!"

"Who the hell finally got to the 8astard?"

TG: it was the killing prince douchebag part that all went wrong  
TG: i mean i put some fucking effort into infiltrating that place  
TG: surveillance and wallclimbing and all sorts of fancy spy shit  
TG: and then when i got there  
TG: there was this troll chick  
TG: she was one of you cause she had one of those dumbass shirts  
TG: and she was wearing this ridiculous red skirt  
TG: long and tight and ruffly  
TG: how do chicks move around in that kind of shit how dont you trip  
TG: and she had this purple headband  
TG: and also  
TG: she had this purple chainsaw  
TG: and she looked at me  
TG: and she said  
TG: Oh Sorry  
TG: I Didnt Mean To Disrupt Your Revenge  
TG: I Just Hate This Fucking Asshole, You See  
TG: and then she offered me a leg

> **I, have to admit, I still love that part.**

The messenger was still waffling, trying to say anything but the truth, and now she knew why: Vriska was not going to take this well. Terezi looked up at Karkat, who was checking a phone of his own, a grim, satisfied look in his eyes.

"You kn3w," she croaked.

"FOUND OUT ALREADY? SO YOU DO HAVE IRONS IN THE FIRE."

"You _kn3w_ ," she repeated, stunned. She knew she shouldn't be. It wasn't just coincidence that had made Karkat into a leader-- and even if it had been, there were lessons you could never unlearn.

"WHAT????!!!!" Vriska shrieked, loud enough to warn the whole castle.

"She-- she was found at the scene, Mistress-- she was found with a bloody chainsaw in her hands-- smiling--"

TG: ...  
TG: what i think im getting at  
TG: what i thinks occured to me  
TG: is that by human standards  
TG: youre all fucking psychopaths  
TG: and im leaving alone the ones i like  
TG: and killing the ones i dont  
TG: when theres probably not much of a difference at all  
TG: but  
TG: i dont know what else to do

> **I tend to try to work out *issues* in fic. Usually philosophical. Here, witness me trying to come to terms with the troll race. TBH, I am probably still working on that one.**

"SORRY IF OUR PLANS OVERLAPPED," said Karkat, not _quite_ smug about it, but insufferably close. " LET'S WORK TOGETHER NEXT TIME."

He limped away, and Vriska was still screaming, but Terezi didn't pay attention; she was watching the words spill onto the screen, line after line, spilling out and out and there was nothing she could say, nothing to do but watch in fascination.

TG: i dont think theres anything else i can do  
TG: she said you were all doomed anyway  
TG: due to prince douchebag, no fucking surprise  
TG: maybe that makes things easier  
TG: fuck  
TG: i let her go  
TG: she was that chick of roses i think  
TG: much as i dont want to think about it  
TG: and i do mean not at fucking all  
TG: i do not want to think about weird timefucked cross-species crushes on my paradox sister  
TG: but i think she had one   


> **...So I have a weakness for Rose/Kanaya. XD**

  
TG: and he did kill her  
TG: and the hope of your race or whatever  
TG: so i guess i just think  
TG: thats reason to flip the fuck out  
TG: even with a chainsaw if thats what you got  
TG: i can understand that  
TG: and hows it different from what im doing anyway  
TG: maybe no one has a choice  
TG: so i let her go  
TG: and no one will sell me any goddamn alcohol  
TG: worlds fucking ending and you care im underage  
TG: anyway just thought id keep you posted  
TG: gonna be killing doombots for a while see if it clears my head   
\--turntechGodhead has disconnected--

"L3t's work tog3th3r," she murmured.

Not a very troll-like sentiment, but it looked like it was going to happen no matter what they tried.

\--

"JESUS CHRIST, I'M GETTING SICK OF THAT SONG," said Karkat, hands over his ears. The landing was only a floor away from Kanaya's room, where she'd been locked up since the Eridan incident-- mostly voluntarily. She hadn't said a word, not to anyone, but she'd been playing music _loudly_ \-- she had a small repertoire of songs, but once she started on one, she would play it over and over and over for hours on end.

GC: W3 COULD 4LW4YS M33T SOM3WH3R3 3LS3.

"NO, SHE HATES IT JUST AS MUCH, THAT MEANS SHE WON'T BE LISTENING. SECURITY, GODDAMN IT, WE HAVE TO PAY ATTENTION TO THIS SHIT THIS TIME."

Terezi rolled her eyes; like he had a right to be complaining, he could probably barely hear it with his normal troll ears. Not like she could, over and over, the same goddamn song: _What you don't know won't hurt you: maybe the lies are true. Try to remember, try to forget those yesterdays being through--_

> **I have gotten pretty good at incorporating my songs-of-the-moment into fics in the least embarassing way possible. I still tend to look back and be embarassed about it, though. XD**

GC: H4V3 YOU H4D 4NY LUCK G3TT1NG THROUGH TO H3R?

"NO. GUESS YOU'VE TRIED TOO, THEN." Karkat leaned against the wall, folding his arms. "YOU'D THINK KILLING ERIDAN WOULD'VE MADE HER HAPPY. IT SURE AS FUCK MADE _ME_ HAPPY. "

GC: 3R1D4N NOT B31NG D34D Y3T M1GHT'V3 B33N TH3 ONLY TH1NG K33P1NG H3R GO1NG.  
GC: 4FT3R TH3 M4TR1ORB, 4ND TH3 B3TR4Y4L, 4ND ROS3...

"WE'RE CALLING THE HUMANS BY NAME, NOW? YEAH, YOU'RE NOT ATTACHED AT ALL. CANDLELIGHT PITY DATE, PARTY OF NONE."

GC: OH SHUT TH3 FUCK UP.

 _You'll never see me coming. You'll never know my name. Try to remember, try to forget, but you'll never be the same--_

"...WE'RE FUCKUPS, YOU KNOW," said Karkat, surprisingly quietly; the takeover and the game had done things to him, and she wasn't at all sure she liked them. "COMPLETE AND UTTER FUCKUPS. SHITTY EXCUSES FOR TROLLS. TOP OF THE FUCKING CULLING LIST."

GC: M4YB3 1 DON'T G1V3 4 SH1T 4BOUT WH4T W3 W3R3 SUPPOS3D TO B3 4NYMOR3.  
GC: M4YB3 1 JUST C4R3 4BOUT WH4T'S R1GHT.

"BUT YOU DID THAT TO BEGIN WITH," said Karkat. "THAT'S WHAT MADE YOU... NOT VRISKA."

> **That and the lack of a cannibal spider parent. That might be about it, though.**

GC: HOW S1CK3N1NGLY SW33T. <3

"...HOW DO YOU SAY ONE OF-- NOT LIKE I WAS GOING TO. FUCK NO, THAT WOULD BE STUPID."

GC: "H34RT"? >:]

"...IRONS," said Karkat, and she sighed. Down to business. "I KNOW YOU HAVE THEM. WHAT DO YOU KNOW?"

GC: 1 H4V3 SOM3ON3 ON TH3 OUTS1D3.  
GC: 4N 4G3NT, 4S 1T W3R3.  
GC: TH3R3 4R3 R3S1ST4NC3 MOV3M3NTS.  
GC: H3 W1LL NOT T3LL M3 MOR3.

"I HOPE YOU'RE NOT FEEDING HIM TOO MUCH INFORMATION," Karkat muttered. "THEY PROBABLY WANT US ALL DEAD TOO."

GC: NOT TH1S ON3.  
GC: TH1S ON3 1S S3L3CT1V3.

"GEE, WHY THE FUCK WOULD HE POSSIBLY LIE."

GC: 1 H4V3N'T TOLD H1M 4NYTH1NG 4BOUT TH3 M41N COMPOUND, WORRYW4RT.  
GC: 1 D1D T3LL H1M 3R1D4N'S GU4RD P4TT3RNS, THOUGH.  
GC: SH4M3 K4N4Y4 B34T H1M TO 1T.

"GUESS I CAN'T ARGUE WITH THAT." Karkat sighed himself. "EQUIUS IS TOO BUSY KISSING FEFERI'S ASS OR SOMETHING TO KICK UP MUCH OF A FUSS. BUT... WHAT THE FUCK DO WE DO ABOUT... HIM?"

> **Though I'm pretty sure this is what he'd be doing, I fully admit I never have any idea WTF to do with Equius. If I'm trying to list trolls, his is usually the name I forget. Partly it's plain dislike, and partly it's that his whole submissive thing tends to lead him under the radar, but I also think he's just not drawn that well as a character. There were too many trolls up in the air, and he's the one who got the shortest end of the stick. and liked it.**

GC: 1S H3 ST1LL H1GH?

"I THINK SO, KEEPS TALKING ABOUT HIS FRIEND MaRyJaNe OR SOME BULLSHIT, AT LEAST IT'S IN ALTERNATING CAPS. BUT WHAT IF HE'S FAKING IT? AND WHAT IF HE'S NOT? WE CAN'T JUST LEAVE HIM THERE, BUT IF HE'S NOT ACTUALLY GONE FUCKING PSYCHO AGAIN YET--" Karkat rubbed his forehead. "GAH, THIS IS FUCKING IMPOSSIBLE!!"

GC: MY 4G3NT 1S D3T3RM1N3D TO GO 4FT3R H1M.

"A HUMAN? AGAINST GAMZEE FUCKING MAKARA? THAT'S FUCKING SUICIDE. AND WAIT, HOW THE FUCK DOES HE KNOW GAMZEE EXISTS IN THE FIRST PLACE? HAS HE EVEN BEEN ON ANY OF THE BROADCASTS?!"

GC: 1'M WORR13D MYS3LF.  
GC: H3 1S C4P4BL3, THOUGH. 4ND TOT4LLY D3T3RM1N3D.  
GC: 1 DON'T TH1NK 1 COULD STOP H1M.

"WELL, TELL HIM I SAID GOODBYE," said Karkat, standing up. "AFTER WHAT I SAW HIM DO TO-- TELL HIM I SAID GOODBYE."

GC: W41T.  
GC: WH4T DO YOU M34N?

"I-- NEVER SAID IT WAS HER, THAT I COULDN'T STOP," said Karkat. "SHE-- SHE GOT THEM TO-- AND WHEN THE FUCK DID SHE BECOME A LEADER, ANYWAY? AND WHY THE FUCK DOES EVERY FUCKING PSYCHO LET ME LIVE?!"

> **IIRC I am vague, at first, about what drives Vriska to it. Of course, at first, she was still 'evil', though it was painfully obvious her mitigating circumstances were going to come out sooner or later-- I really had a lot of trouble with her before that conversation with John, something about the suspense of KNOWING it was all going to come out when it hadn't yet. Now that is is all out in the open, I have a much easier time thinking clearly about her.**
> 
>  **Anyway, why would newer, more complicated Vriska do something like this? Sometimes I have a bad habit of taking shortcuts that way, "if something like this happened at some point it would lead to what I'm actually focusing on, here". Should anything else in this vein ever get finished, it will be addressed a little more. Old habits, and old elitism, and maybe an uncomfortable truth too many...**

Terezi opened her mouth, reflexively, but Karkat was already gone, faster than she'd ever seen him on those crutches, and on reflection, she really wasn't sure what she could say.

She pulled out her phone, reading the message-window she hadn't been able to bring herself to close one more time.

TG: nice try rez  
TG: i found the juggalo motherfucker  
TG: and im not letting him go  
TG: dont worry  
TG: i'm gonna kick his ass  
TG: hopping a train see you on the flip side   
\--turntechGodhead has disconnected--

 _Try to remember, try to forget, but you'll never be the same--_

"Would you stop w1th th4t moth3rfuck1ng song!!" Terezi tried to scream, and grimaced, swallowing down blood. It'd only come out as a harsh whisper; she never would've heard it anyway.

And there wasn't a thing in the world she could say to stop him.

\--

She wasn't sure why she was playing this game to try to distract herself when he was the one who'd pointed her toward the goddamn thing; she was thinking of him every moment, flubbing every cross-examination. She felt vaguely ashamed for destroying the main character's dignity this way, but she couldn't stay focused, not for anything.

GC: YOU KNOW, FORG1NG 3V1D3NC3 1S 4PP4R3NTLY 1LL3G4L 1N HUM4N JUST1C3 SYST3MS?   
CG: YOUR FUCKWIT AGENT'S REALLY TRYING IT, ISN'T HE?  
CG: HOLY SHIT. HE IS STUPID, AND FOR NOT KILLING HIM YOURELF, YOU MIGHT BE WORSE.  
CG: FUCK, I HOPE HE DOESN'T FUCK UP EVEN WORSE AND SEND GAMZEE INTO ONE OF THOSE...  
CG: THINGS.

Terezi winced; the coolkid had said that he might've done it, once, was at least one of the first people to witness Gamzee's breakdown. She hadn't been able to reassure him, no one knew if Gamzee had any trigger but the lack of drugs, but if he had done it before-- or if he was a trigger this time... the Bard of Rage, walking the earth. It'd make the takeover transition look like... she couldn't really think of anything in Alternian society that was anything less than genocidal. The point stood.

CG: WHERE HAS HE BEEN HIDING, ANYWAY?   
GC: H3 S4YS SOM3WH3RE NORTH.  
GC: COLD, 4ND 1SOL4T3D, 4ND BY TH3 S34.  
GC: TH4T'S 4LL H3'D S4Y.   
CG: SHOULD HE BE THERE BY NOW?  
CG: BY WHICH I MEAN, ARE WE FUCKED YET?   
GC: 1T'S H4RD TO T3LL.  
GC: 1 TH1NK SO.

She looked back down at her DS, and was startled into an actual laugh, a stab through her raspy throat.

GC: 4H H4 H4, TH1S 1S TH3 B3ST G4M3 3V3R.   
CG: OH WHAT THE FUCK  
CG: ARE WE TALKING ABOUT THIS STUPID GAME OF YOURS INSTEAD OF YOUR DUMBASS FRIEND GETTING KILLED?   
GC: OBJ3CT1ON!!!!  
GC: GO 4W4Y!!!!!  
GC: >X]   
CG: OH WHAT THE FUCK EVER.

Another window popped up; she nearly dropped her phone, she switched to it so quickly. "Friend". She supposed he was a friend.

TG: god fucking dammit   
GC: WH4T'S WRONG?!   
TG: when did i get so fucking slow  
TG: used to live ten days at once moving like lightning  
TG: knight of fucking time goddammit  
TG: why doesnt that mean a goddamn thing   


> **This is probably not actually a good venue for a ramble on whether or not the game's titles actually mean anything, is it?**

  
GC: WH4T 4R3 YOU T4LK1NG 4BOUT??  
GC: 4R3 YOU OK4Y??   
TG: im just fucking dandy  
TG: here in fucking maine with nothing to do   
GC: WH4T?   
TG: i mean i got beat again  
TG: someone beat me to it  
TG: hes already dead

"Wh4t?!" Terezi shrieked, and spent a good thirty seconds swallowing and coughing against the blood and pain. She straightened as quickly as she could, switching chat windows.

GC: OH HOLY SH1T  
GC: H3'S D34D   
CG: WELL DUH.  
CG: I'M SORRY, BUT I WARNED YOU.  
CG: NO HUMAN STOOD A CHANCE AGAINST HIM. NOT EVEN WE STOOD A CHANCE AGAINST HIM.   
GC: NOT H1M, YOU 1D1OT.  
GC: G4MZ33!!

She switched to the other window, typing furiously; luckily there was no one around to see, not here, not today.

GC: HOW?!??   
TG: man how should i know  
TG: happened before i showed up  
TG: not by long i think  
TG: how long does troll blood take to dry  
TG: never mind i dont want to know  
TG: i dont want to know you know

> **She does, though. Maybe she even read it in a book. I guess you never know.**

CG: NO FUCKING WAY.  
CG: NO FUCKING WAY.  
CG: SOME HUMAN MANAGED TO KILL THE BARD OF FUCKING RAGE?!  
CG: HE'S A LIAR.   
GC: SHUT UP, K4RK4T, H3 S4YS H3 W4S D34D WH3N H3 GOT TH3R3!!  
GC: POOR TH1NG, H3 H4SN'T GOTT3N TO K1LL 4NYON3 4T 4LL >:[   
CG: WHAT?!  
CG: THEN WHO THE FUCK KILLED HIM?!

Terezi rubbed at her head, trying to think logically, even without her crack investigative team. What would she have sent them to do?

GC: 4R3 TH3R3 4NY F1NG3RPR1NTS?   
TG: what the fuck  
TG: what do you think i am csi  
TG: horatio fucking caine  
TG: i couldnt catch him  
TG: looks like he ran out   
*TG puts on shades   
TG: out of time  
TG: YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH   
GC: 4RRGH, WH4T3V3R TH3 FUCK TH1S 1S, W3 DON'T H4V3 T1M3 FOR 1T!!   
TG: what no troll david caruso   
GC: HUH?   
TG: wow thats actually surprising to me  
TG: guess he got   
*TG puts on shades   
TG: left out in the culled  
TG: YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH   


> **...Other favorite conversation XD**

  
GC: D4MM1T, COOLK1D!!   
TG: the point is i dont have anything to take fingerprints with  
TG: and nothing to compare them with  
TG: and dont intend to stick around too long  
TG: its the ass end of nowhere but the bots are getting here eventually  
TG: actually i was surprised how many bots there were   
GC: 3QU1US. SO H3 KN3W.  
GC: TH4T 3XPL41NS WHY K4RK4T D1DN'T.   
TG: what

GC: YOU N3V3R 4SK3D 3QU1US WH3R3 G4MZ33 W4S, D1D YOU?   
CG: FUCK NO, WHY WOULD I TALK TO THAT CREEPY BASTARD IF I DIDN'T ABSOLUTELY  
CG: FUCK.  
CG: OF COURSE HE'D KEEP TRACK OF HIM, CREEPY FUCKER FUCKING GOT OFF ON BEING KILLED.  
CG: YOU REALLY THINK HE KNEW?   
GC: MY 4G3NT R3PORTS 4 D1SPROPORT1ON4T3 NUMB3R OF BOTS N34R TH3 SC3N3 OF TH3 CR1M3.  
GC: TH3Y W3R3 PROT3CT1NG SOM3TH1NG.   
CG: BUT THAT CREEPY FUCK WOULD NEVER HAVE DONE IT. NOT IN A MILLION YEARS.   
GC: TRU3...

GC: HOW 4BOUT TH3 C4US3 OF D34TH?   
TG: fuck if i know  
TG: theres a whole lot of blood  
TG: sure it looks like oil paint but its still fucking gross   
GC: DO YOU W4NT TO 4DV4NC3 TH3 COURS3 OF JUST1C3 OR NOT??   
TG: man whatever  
TG: it looks like  
TG: he was fucking mauled or something   
GC: ...  
GC: W41T, WH4T?!   
TG: like a tiger got him or something  
TG: but theres no tigers in bumfuck maine   
GC: OH.  
GC: MY.  
GC: GOD.   
TG: what

GC: K4RK4T.  
GC: H3 W4S M4UL3D.  
GC: 1T W4S FUCK1NG N3P3T4.   
CG: WHAT?!  
CG: NO FUCKING WAY. THERE IS NO FUCKING WAY.  
CG: THERE'S JUST NO FUCKING WAY!!  
CG: SHE DOESN'T HAVE THE FIREPOWER.   
GC: M4YB3 SH3'S B33N TR41N1NG.  
GC: M4YB3 H3 W4S TOO STON3D TO F1GHT.   
CG: I DON'T CARE, SHE WAS SO-- WELL, WEAK, DAMMIT!  
CG: HOW THE FUCK COULD SHE HAVE KILLED HIM?  
CG: AND WHY?!   
GC: ...  
GC: 3V3N 1F H3 D1DN'T M1ND...  
GC: H3 K1LL3D 3QU1US.  
GC: NOT TO M3NT1ON...   
CG: THERE'S NO FUCKING WAY.  
CG: THIS GUY'S LYING TO YOU.

> **There's the thing. I might not give a damn that Equius died. The others might not give a damn. Equius himself honestly didn't seem at all bothered.**
> 
>  **Nepeta, though. Nepeta gave a damn. And she might be one of the sweet ones, but I bet you anything she could hold one hell of a grudge...**

GC: N3P3T4.  
GC: 1 C4N'T B3L13V3 1T.  
GC: 1T W4S SO 34SY TO FORG3T SH3 COULD HURT 4NYTH1NG 4T 4LL.  
GC: BUT SH3 COULD.   
TG: okay glad i could help theres another troll chick off my list  
TG: though why theyve got to kill everyone im after i dont know  
TG: dont you kill vriska before me i swear i will kick your ass   
GC: N3V3R. >:]   
TG: ok g2g bots on my ass  
TG: gonna see you in person soon  
TG: main events coming up and at least shell be easy to find  
TG: see you then   
\--turntechGodhead has disconnected--

Terezi swallowed. Not that she didn't believe in him, but... But yes, she was a little bit afraid.

No, fuck that. They'd put the traitor in her place, she and him, in a trial to go down in history.

GC: H3'S NOT LY1NG.   
CG: YOU'VE FOUND ANOTHER STUPID HUMAN BOY TO CRUSH ON, HAVEN'T YOU?  
CG: ANOTHER FUCKING "COOLKID". CHRIST, YOU ARE SO PREDICTABLE.  
CG: SOMEONE WHO REMINDS YOU OF HIM.   
GC: SHUT UP, 1 H4V3 NOT!!  
GC: H3 1S ON3 OF 4 K1ND.  
GC: W4S.  
GC: HE W4S ON3 OF 4 K1ND.   
CG: GOD DAMN IT, TEREZI, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO FUCKING COPE WITH IT.  
CG: THEY'RE DEAD. HE'S DEAD. SHE FUCKING KILLED HIM HERSELF.  
CG: SHE HAS FUCKING VIDEO. SHE HAS HIS BLOODSTAINED CLOTHES.  
CG: NOT EVEN A LACKEY. SHE KILLED HIM HERSELF. SHE PUT ONE OF HIS OWN FUCKING SWORDS THROUGH HIS BACK.  
CG: DO I HAVE TO SHOW YOU?!   
GC: V1D3O?  
GC: TH3 S1CK FUCK TOOK V1D3O?   
CG: I DIDN'T THINK YOU'D WANT TO SEE IT, SINCE YOU FLIPPED OUT ENOUGH LAST TIME.  
CG: AND THAT WAS JUST SOME DOOMED-TIMELINE DUPLICATE.  
CG: IT ISN'T PRETTY.  
CG: AND HE'S FUCKING DEAD.   
GC: SHUT UP.   
CG: I'M SORRY. YOU JUST NEED TO GET THAT THROUGH YOUR THICK SKULL.   
GC: K4RK4T, K4RK4T, SO FUCK1NG CH4RM1NG.  
GC: DON'T T3LL M3 WH4T 1 DO 4ND DON'T KNOW.  
GC: NOW FUCK OFF.   
\--gallowsCalibrator has blocked carcinoGeneticist\--

She bit her lip until she tasted blood. It wasn't a question she'd thought to ask before; she'd been too damn relieved.

 _How the hell had he gotten away?_

\--

GC: 1'M GO1NG TO K33P 4SK1NG.   
TG: no problem  
TG: im gonna keep not giving a fuck  
TG: glad weve come to an arrangement on this   
GC: HOW D1D YOU DO 1T?   
TG: secret   
GC: OH COM3 ON.   
TG: look its going down tomorrow okay  
TG: gotta break into a fucking palace kill the traitor bitch who killed my best friend  
TG: its gonna be pretty fucking busy  
TG: can i take one fucking night off   
GC: W1N3, WOM3N, 4ND SONG?   


> **This is probably more of a Southernism than anything Terezi should say...**

  
TG: they still wont let me drink  
TG: these chicks are old enough to be my mother  
TG: and i havent been able to lay down any beats in fucking months  
TG: left all my shit at home  
TG: these shades cant handle that kind of processing   
GC: >:[   
TG: know enough music to get some down in a fucking notebook  
TG: looks shitty but should be readable  
TG: when shit settles down  
TG: ought to be able to put it together  
TG: if its worth anything  
TG: also is that some sort of troll saying   
GC: 1 P1CK3D 1T UP FROM SOM3WH3R3.   


> **...Which I weasel out of by lampshading, as usual, sigh XD**

  
TG: theres a show though.  
TG: gonna catch it  
TG; see if theres any fun to make in this town  
TG: catch some zs   
GC: 1 ST1LL W4NT TO KNOW HOW YOU D1D 1T.   
TG: god damn  
TG: could you ask me later then   
GC: >:[  
GC: ON3 DO3S NOT K33P 4 L3G1SL4C3R4TOR W41T1NG.  
GC: BUT UND3R TH3 C1RCUMST4NC3S...  
GC: 1 GU3SS 1'LL L3T YOU G3T 4W4Y W1TH 1T.  
GC: H4V3 FUN, COOLK1D.  
GC: JUST1C3 COM3S TOMORROW. >:]   
TG: yeah its nice working with you madam prosecutor  
TG: later   
\--turntechGodhead has disconnected--

There was video; this was true. It was fuzzy, but it wasn't fake. She'd forced herself to watch it, forced herself to try to look for clues, but her jaw kept clamping shut, her hands clapping over her ears, every time the crucial moment came around. She shouldn't be this squeamish. It was unseemly, unprofessional. But every time she feinted behind him, every time Vriska thrust the unbroken human sword through his back, something in her just shut down.

> **It's an interesting scene, when she runs away after Dave is stabbed. It doesn't seem like it should be as big a deal as it clearly is to her. All indications are that death is cheap on Alternia, and even though I disagree that "beta" timelines mean less, no one else in the series has yet been seen to agree. Gives a lot of food for thought, really. Is it possible that, despite her courtly pantomimes, despite her LARP adventures, despite Alternia and SBurb, she really hasn't willingly caused many deaths, or even seen many actually happen?...**

Maybe Karkat was right. Maybe she was a fucking awful troll.

That didn't matter. She was the only legislacerator left, even if she hadn't technically been one to begin with, and she would see this trial through.

Which meant that there was something she needed.

There were special rules for hanging, but the lynching of a murderer was another matter entirely, a matter of solemn ceremony. She couldn't use just any rope from the local hardware store for this; she was going to have to find something special. And she knew just where to look.

There were locks on the cabinets, but they were cheap and human-made, almost afterthoughts; she hadn't thought anyone would want to steal these. She sniffed a little, at the dark, dusty iron of old human blood; There was just the faintest trace of them still left-- just a bit of ink and tea, of grass and gunpowder, of cake and ozone, and-- maybe she was just imagining it-- of magma and cherry-apple-candy.

It didn't make sense. But here this was, and there he was; the evidence was incontrovertible.

 _Logic_ , she thought, and laughed; logic hadn't applied to her life for months and months now.

"hi."

> **This is another section I had to alter after events in the comic, for the better I think... alive-Aradia is really much better for this conversation. She can care.**

Terezi turned, sharply; then she relaxed. It was Aradia; she was safe with Aradia, who'd killed Vriska once herself, who'd given the coolkid his element.

GC: H3LLO.  
GC: WH4T 4R3 YOU DO1NG UP H3R3?   
AA: the usual  
AA: knew I had to to fix up the timeline    
GC: OH. FROM TH3 FUTUR3, TH3N?   
AA: yeah  
AA: i know its awkward but you mentioned a conversation  
AA: which i knew i hadnt had  
AA: =(   


> **The trick here was trying to make this conversation plausible in retrospect without giving everything away. I find it's not a good idea to build something *solely* as a mystery, to leave everything hanging on the plot-twists, but it is really nice if you can engineer a surprise.**

  
GC: SO YOU KNOW WH4T'S GO1NG TO H4PP3N?   
AA: tomorrow?  
AA: yeah  
AA: i cant tell you though  
AA: i just had to come to stabilize the time loop.  
AA: offshoot timelines arent allowed anymore   
GC: "OFFSHOOT T1M3L1N3S"?   
AA: like the ones that made us possible actually!  
AA: things like paradoxes and uncaused events  
AA: those were only possible because sburb was messing with the foundations of the universe  
AA: now its gone were back to the natural laws again   


> **SBurb having fucked with the creation of several universes, I find this explanation even more plausible in retrospect. There's really no telling how widespread the effects are. These rules of time travel being more simple and convenient, of course, has nothing whatsoever to do with it... XD**

  
AA: loops are okay  
AA: grandfather paradox isnt, you cant undo something that you wouldnt be able to go back in time without  
AA: and theres only so many loops you can have at a time too  
AA: no more million aradiabots  
AA: but thats 0k  
AA: i mean okay  
AA: i didnt like being a robot  
AA: equius isnt really good at programming emotions  
AA: and he didnt understand me at all.   


> **Aradia and Aradia-bot do seem awfully different. What would be nice would be having enough material to figure out why, how much was being dead, and how much dubious programming... Guesses can be made, though.**

  
GC: WHY 4R3 YOU T3LL1NG M3 4LL TH1S?   
AA: because it came up  
AA: and because i need to  
AA: for tomorrow   
GC: ?   
AA: you know i cant say =(  
AA: youve been talking to him for a while huh?   
GC: Y34H.  
GC: 1 W4RN3D H1M 4W4Y.   
AA: thank you! =)  
AA: i always liked him  
AA: he was a bit of an asshole to me sometimes  
AA: but they were crappy circumstances  
AA: that brought out the worst in all of us  
AA: and the best in only a few.  
AA: it brought out the best in him.

Terezi shivered; she didn't like this. Sure, Aradia could be creepy, even now that she was mostly okay; but something about this...

GC: W3'R3 F1N4LLY GO1NG TO G3T TH4T B1TCH.   
AA: also good =)  
AA: mostly i settled my scores with her when i beat her to death but this...  
AA: this is inexcusable  
AA: and she knows it  
AA: she wants to be remorseless because thats how were supposed to be  
AA: but we have a choice now   
GC: YOU KNOW, 1 K33P G3TT1NG 4SK3D TH1S QU3ST1ON, 4ND SOM3HOW 1 N3V3R THOUGHT TO 4SK YOU.  
GC: 4ND H3 N3V3R 3V3N 4SK3D M3 TO 4SK YOU.  
GC: WHY D1DN'T YOU STOP HER?   
AA: because i couldnt   
GC: D1D YOU TRY?   
AA: thats how i found out about the grandfather-paradox rule  
AA: by the time i heard they were all gone  
AA: if i hadnt heard they were all gone i wouldnt have gone back in time to stop her  
AA: so that wasnt allowed   
GC: TH4T'S 4 D4MN3D SH4M3.   
AA: yeah   
GC: BUT WH4T 4BOUT S1NC3 TH3N?   
AA: i tried  
AA: i couldnt  
AA: but thats the conversation we had to have tonight   
GC: YOU COULDN'T?   
AA: im sorry =(  
AA: ill see you tomorrow terezi  
AA: happy plaiting!

Terezi wanted to say something else, but Aradia disappeared in a flash of red. Metal-raspberry-ashes... they were so similar, even though they had no right to be, even though they were so different.

What would the coolkid have been like as a troll, she suddenly wondered? What color would his blood have been, what would he have wanted to be? What would they have been like raised human?

 _Too late_ , she thought, that sense of uneasiness, of doom, still upon her. _Impossible, and too late..._

Besides; that was all theoretical, and theoretical things didn't matter. What mattered to her was justice.

If she didn't sleep tonight, it would simply be in pursuit of her calling.

\--

There was a meeting called for today. She could've captchalogued the rope, to keep it hidden out of sight, to keep her intentions secret for just a while longer, but she wanted it close at hand... and besides, she wasn't finished plaiting yet. Just a couple feet to go.

> **Someone who was better with trolls would probably have gone on more about kismeses here, either shipping it up, or including protestations that was a strictly platonic hate, or something. Honestly I think that's a little overplayed, but still, a parenthetical mention at least once would probably have been a good idea. I just honestly don't _get_ blackrom on anything but a theoretical level. I can't personally understand hate and attraction being mixed, and auspisticeship just strikes me as a terrible idea...having played Kanaya in my time. The wild popularity of the concept proves, I think, that it's a good idea that strikes a chord; I'm just... grey-A, as it were. **
> 
> **(possibly in the conventional sense as well, but i can never apply a label without thinking of how it doesn't fit, so... moving on!)**
> 
>  **(random headcanon: Tavros is also incapable of dealing properly with black romances. In troll society, this is less an orientation than a death sentence.)**

"NO WAY EQUIUS IS GONNA SHOW UP. HE NEVER SHOWS UP, AND AFTER THIS, LIKE FUCK HE'S GOING TO SHOW HIS SWEATY NOOKLICKER FACE. HE'LL KEEP NEPETA AWAY TOO, IF HE'S NOT ANGRY WITH HER OVER... THAT THING THAT APPARENTLY HAPPENED DESPITE ALL LOGIC... ACTUALLY EITHER WAY HE'S KEEPING HER, IT'S FUCKING CREEPY AND I'M AN ASSHOLE FOR NOT PAYING ANY ATTENTION TO HER."

GC:TH4T L34V3S S1X.  
GC: P3RF3CT. >:]

"PERFECT? PERFECT FOR..." Karkat looked down, at the neat braid she was making, and gaped. "WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?!" he hissed at her, with genuine alarm.

GC: M4K1NG 4 ROP3.  
GC: DON'T YOU P4Y 4TT3NT1ON TO L3G4L POL1CY?  
GC: 1T'S 4 M4TT3R OF PROC3DUR3 1N MURD3R C4S3S.

> **Which luckily I can make up wholesale. :D It's really fun!**

"WHAT THE FUCK-- TEREZI, FOR FUCK'S SAKE, YOU CAN'T FUCKING PROSECUTE VRISKA SERKET!!"

GC: W4TCH M3.

"WATCH YOU DIE? NO FUCKING THANKS, I THINK I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF THAT TO LAST ME A LIFETIME OR THREE-- WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU THINKING?! ARE YOU THINKING?! DID SOMETHING IN YOUR TWISTED LITTLE HEAD FINALLY SNAP?!"

GC: MY GOD, 4R3 YOU 4 CH4RM3R.  
GC: YOU MUST H4V3 4LL TH3 4DM1R3RS.  
GC: 4LL OF TH3M.

"I DON'T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT THAT, I JUST WANT YOU NOT TO DO YOUR BEST TO GET VRISKA TO GET ALL BARD OF RAGE ON YOUR INTERNAL ORGANS!!"

> **Gamzee's exploits, at the time, seemed like they would leave more of an emotional impression. Then again, they probably would, really. Exploring emotional repurcussions has never been the strongest point of Homestuck. See also: John's "wow we had an asweome adventure today didn't we karkat??", other examples too numerous to list.**

GC: WH4T, YOU TH1NK 1 DON'T C4R3 4BOUT YOU?  
GC: SUCH 4 CH4RM3R.

"GOD DAMN IT, TEREZI!! I HATE THIS, I HATE HER, I HATE THAT THEY'RE DEAD, BUT THE ONLY THING THAT COULD MAKE THIS EVEN FUCKING WORSE IS YOU BEING DEAD TOO!!!"

She just looked up at him, with a faint smile. Almost sweet of him; really; he just didn't understand, and she couldn't explain. But it would be clear soon enough.

No more million Aradiabots. No more duplicates. Not another doomed-timeline kid, then. So how had he faked it?

"Oh, I Recognize This," said Kanaya, settling down across the table, a vague smile on her face. "How Lovely. Will There Be A Traditional Food-Slinging Ceremony After The Lynching, As Tradition Dictates?"

GC: 1'M SUR3 TH4T C4N B3 4RR4NG3D.  
GC: 1 D1DN'T KNOW YOU W3R3 SO KNOWL3DG34BL3, K4N4Y4! >:]

"I Realized A Long Time Ago That She Might End Her Life On The End Of A Rope," she said. "Back Then I Was Not Hoping For It, But I Thought Attaining An Expertise In The Ceremonial Rites Might Be Advantageous Nonetheless."

> **She used to think she'd be breaking her out, you see. Assisting in a brilliant and unforgettable escape. The two of them would be legendary, she thought. She was young back then.**

But it hadn't smelled fake. Wouldn't she have known a fake when she saw it? Hadn't she always before?

"Hello-- wait, is that a rope?" said Aradia. "I didnt know todays meeting was going to be this exciting!"

> **This portrayal actually seems more accurate in retrospect. Score _one_ for foresight? **

GC: 1 TR13D TO W4RN YOU, BUT 1T TURN3D OUT TO B3 YOU FROM TH3 FUTUR3.  
GC: JUST SO YOU KNOW. YOU S41D SOME3TH1NG 4BOUT T1M3L1N3S B31NG 1MPORT4NT NOW.

"Oh, yes, they are! i never told you that, did i? guess im going to have to go back and explain it to you then!"

"WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU ALL SO GODDAMN CALM ABOUT THIS?!" Karkat yelled. "SHE'S GOING TO GET HER STUPID PSYCHO CANE-HAPPY ASS KILLED!!"

> **I would be interested to hear opinions on how well adding all the quirks and colors to the speech worked. It feels a bit disingenuous, though, as after coding this 12,000 word fic, I am pretty sure I am _never doing that again_. XD **

"dude," said Sollux, walking in with Feferi, "it's n0t like that's anything new 0r anything. she can handle herself fine."

"What's got you seaing red today, Karcrab?" Feferi giggled.

> **I like Sollux, and Feferi, and Sollux <3Feferi. I still feel that they're-- _sketchy_ , somehow, thoush I know Sollux at least has had a fair bit of screentime, and Feferi-- we learned too much about Feferi from Eridan, and Eridan barely knows her at all. Also, I cannot manage her typing quirk. I am reaching for puns after a couple of lines and feeling like an idiot. Sure, it shouldn't be an every-other-line quirk, but it is very noticably there. Maybe more study...**

"WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?!?!"

"May8e they just don't know me like you do."

And there she was, finally, the troll of the hour, their Glorious Unofficial Leader, grinning down at her with that poison-sweet, blueberry-tang grin. "Look who's 8een 8reaking and entering. Is that proper 8eh8vior for a legislacer8or?"

"R3QU1S1T1ON1NG 3V1D3NC3 1S 1ND33D," said Terezi. Her voice was quiet, and hoarse as the grave, but she'd been training; she had enough of a voice to get through this. "YOU KNOW TH3 C3R3MON14L NOOS3 H4S TO B3 SP3C14L. 1T H4S TO B3 R3PR3S3NT4T1V3 OF TH3 D3F3ND4NT'S CR1M3S. WH4T 3LS3 COULD 1 POSS1BLY US3?"

"Oh, this should be entert8ning," laughed Vriska. "Fine, tear my trophies apart, I was never attached to them anyway. That's a cute little rope you've got there. How's this go again? Oh yeah, first you present the c8se."

She dared lecture Terezi on matters of court? She stood, outwardly unruffled, but her blod boiling with approproate prosecurorial vigor. "VR1SK4 S3RK3T. 1 4CCUS3 YOU OF TH3 FOLLOW1NG CR1M3S. 1 4CCUS3 YOU OF V1OL3NC3 UNW4RR4NT3D 4GA1NST THOS3 OF 3QU4L OR H1GH3R BLOOD. 1 4CCUS3 YOU OF BR34CH OF CONTR4CT AND B3TR4Y4L W1THOUT GROUNDS. 1 4CCUS3 YOU OF UNPR3C3D3NT3D 4ND UNL4WFUL G3NOC1DE W1THOUT DU3 PROC3SS OF L4W. WH4T S4Y YOU, WH3N CONFRONT3D W1TH YOUR CR1MES?"

> **Troll court would, I think, have to be very complicated-- this is a crime only _if_ a litany of conditiona are met-- or very simple-- I am going to prosecute whoever the fuck I need to for political expediency, or proves too great a public nuisance to slip away, or pisses me off. Either is plausible, to be honest, and I suspect it's a blend of both. But I don't think it's purely the latter. Terezi and Redglare have too great a love of the craft for that. It's probably a morass of qualifications and loopholes, carefully tuned to be inpenetrable to the non-specialist, exploited with varying degrees of honesty by different legislacerators. Or, ours, with slightly different priorities.  >_> **

Vriska just laughed. "You can't pin the violence on me, the contracts were never signed, and there was no one to petition to get the genocide cleared! Do you really think they would've given a shit?"

"PROB4BLY NOT. TH3Y WOULD 4LSO NOT H4V3 C4R3D 4BOUT TH3 T3CHN1C4L1TY YOU C1T3." Terezi circled, slowly, twisting the rope in her hands.

"Point to the 8lind girl," Vriska laughed again, utterly unconcerned. Terezi wasn't frazzled; soon she'd understand. "Doesn't matter. This isn't a court. There isn't a judge--"

"H4D YOU STUD13D TH3 L4WS YOU SO FL4GR4NTLY BR34K, YOU WOULD KNOW TH4T TH3R3 4R3 4LLOW4NC3S FOR SP3C14L C1RCUMST4NC3S. P4RT1CUL4RLY 1N C4S3S-- OF MURD3R." Terezi grinned; she lived for this. Finally, finally, a witness who would talk back-- a criminal with a neck the noose would snap.

> **One could note that Terezi is just as bloodthirsty as Vriska, or more, since she has far more choice in the matter; there's a Dexter comparison to be made, I imagine, with the question of just how much difference is really made by lofty ideals and a code. I tend to view her more charitably than that. But I'm never sure I should.**

"Terezi, Terezi, Terezi." Vriska shook her head. "I h8 to see you fall this far. Finally admitting it, aren't we?"

"4DM1TT1NG WH4T?"

"A murder case has to have a victimized party. Everyone else I killed has 8een dead for 8ges. There's 8een whispers, Terezi. We're all _worried_ a8out you. We know what you 8elieve. "

Vriska leaned in, with a grin of sharp teeth. " _You actually 8elieve he's alive._ "

Terezi tilted her head. "4ND?"

Vriska shook her head, the perfect display of stunned incredulity. "And he's dead, Terezi! I killed him myself! You're making ropes out of his 8loodstained clothes! I knew I 8eat the shit out of you in the t8keover, 8ut I didn't think I'd damaged your _8rain_! "

"SO YOU 4LL3G3 M3NT4L 1NST4B1L1TY," said Terezi, not rattled. It was an interesting argument, if a moot one. Then again, Vriska didn't seriously believe she was on trial yet. She'd learn. She would learn.

"Well, duh!!!!!!!! You've 8een pestering a dead 8oy! Let me present the facts."

And Vriska was circling, now; Terezi felt a taste of her power pressing against her skin. Not enough to take over, but an _influence_ , and her stomach flipped at the stench of it, just as it always had.

> **Probably not at first. But we tend to rewrite our history, after such breakups; and I have no doubt there were a lot of Vriska's qualities that Terezi purposely overlooked, at first.**

"D8ve Strider is dead. 8ut you've 8een messaging him for months. You claim he's 8een trying to kill us-- yes, Karkat, I heard your convers8tions, shut your goddamn hole-- and yet somehow, this "Coolk1d" of yours, this super human who 8ested even me, hasn't landed a 8low on any of them. No one's seen him. No one's heard of him. He hasn't affected a single thing. The kid who was in every 8ulge and nook of his goddamn session! Knight of fucking Time, and here I am, alive and well!!!!!!!!"

She spread her arms out wide, the picture of innocence; she knew that they believed her, and she understood why. For a moment, she even entertained the idea herself. _The messages would all have been delusions. The information I got from him nothing but what I'd guessed and overheard. When I see him come though those doors, it will be because I've finally snapped--_

> **I very seriously considered this twist. Up until Aradia's section, and with handwaving even then, it was perfectly plausible. It was very tempting, one of those great psychological twists-- but that's the thing; at this point, "imaginary-all-along" is really a cliche. What could I really do with it, here? Turn Terezi into a heartbroken madwoman? What would be useful or interesting there? Where would that story go, what would it really be saying?**
> 
>  **So I thought about it, for a day or so, and then I teased it and went on as usual. Looking back, I only see more reasons why that was the right decision.**

"She's fucking psychotic," said Vriska. "I know you think I'm dangerous, 8ut she's fucking hallucinating! Can you give me one reason we shouldn't lock her away??"

> **I've grown more tolerant of misunderstanding-based plots as I've grown older and slightly less hypersensitive, but as a kid, _God_ did I ever hate them. Still do, really. Some random idiot shows up and tells you your best friend is a traitor, and you should really ditch them and help this new guy out? Sure! What good could listening to explanations possibly do?? It's okay when there are plausible _reasons_ for there to be a misunderstanding-- though it's still not at all my favorite plot device, even then-- but I've seen too many that would have been resolved with a little trust, the right question, or thirty seconds of thought.**
> 
>  **Basically, there are a lot of plot conversations that should've gone a lot more like this.**

"SURE," said Karkat, brusque and unafraid; she hadn't expected him to find his courage again, but there it was. "WE DIDN'T LOCK UP GAMZEE FUCKING MAKARA. CASE CLOSED."

"And because she's Te-ray-sea!" Feferi chimed in, full of the blind stupid faith that was the only reason they were alive.

"and because she's never killed any 0f us," said Sollux, ironic as hell, with an echo of old bitterness, but still surprisingly fond.

"aND BECAUSE, SHE'S NOT A LIAR," said Tavros, and Terezi raised her eyebrows; he'd come in behind Vriska, he'd been so omnipresent behind her the past few months that she hadn't even noticed until now. Had he gotten his voice back at last?

"And Because You Are A Traitor," said Kanaya, with the voice of someone who had learned that a long time ago.

"and because shes telling the truth," said Aradia, very quiet.

Terezi grinned. "1N C4S3S 3XTR4ORD1N4RY, 4 P4N3L OF S1X JURORS FROM THROUGHOUT TH3 H3MOSP3CTRUM M4Y B3 4PPO1NT3D TO H34R TH3 M3R1TS OF 4 C4S3, 4ND TH31R JUDGM3NTS UPH3LD W1TH TH3 FULL W31GHT OF TH3 L4W. TH1S 1S 4 C4S3 3XTR4ORD1N4RY, VR1SK4 S3RK3T, 4ND 4 JURY F41R 4ND B4L4NC3D H4S FOUND YOU GU1LTY. W1LL YOU F4C3 YOUR S3NT3NC3?"

The taste of nervousness! Terezi savored it, listening to Vriska swallow. "You're going to listen to the-- fine! Whatever. A sentence requires a wronged party, doesn't it?! Where the fuck are you going to find that?!?!?!?!"

"Dude, step outside, you'll be tripping over the fuckers," said the Coolkid, and her grin almost split her face.

Justice at last.

> **Dave should also be complicated. I can't say whether it's just time and experience, or actually more written about him, or some sort of sympathy, that makes me think he isn't.**
> 
>  **Still hard to write his quips, though, and I'm always amazed I get away with it. I totally lack the necessary cultural referents. >_> **

"WHAT THE FUCK??" Karkat jumped back, knocking into the table.

"W--" Vriska was staring. "Oh, you went 8ll out, Ter8zi, where'd you find some loser to f8ke--"

He whipped out a sword from his sylladex-- a broken scarlet sword, his session's ultimate weapon. No one else could have it. No one else could even touch its blade. "Like anyone could fake this coolness, it fucking kills you being this ice cold. I'm the genuine fucking article, bitch, and it's time for round two."

> **Dave's lines here all have edges, and they cut both ways; and I wince a little reading them (writing them), but I love it.**

"I-- I--" Vriska gaped; it was so delicious watching her lost for words that she could almost ignore that nagging goddamn question-- "I fucking killed you!!!!!!!! Don't try to t8ll me I didn't, I was fucking there, I watched you 8leed, I watched you die, I KNOW DE8TH WHEN I S8E IT!!!!!!!!"

He raised his sword; casually examined the glint of the light off the blade. The silence was thick as cotton through the room, but he just let it sit, and sit, until she thought she was going to go insane from it herself.

"Yeah," he said, finally, "you killed me, all right. There's just one problem, Vriska."

He raised his sword. " _I killed you first._ "

She didn't understand.

And then, suddenly, she did.

> **Reading this back, I think there are a lot of places I could have held off on the exposition; I was probably being careful, because usually my problems are under-explaining rather than the reverse. This, though, I think works fairly well.**
> 
>  **It's a delicate frickin' balance, though, one that depends quite a bit on taste, and I am still trying to perfect it. Inasmuch as it can be. Past a certain point, I'm not sure I believe in universal standards of quality writing.**

Terezi's throat felt tight. A touch of feathers, a touch of mercury, tainted the cherry-iron-ash as the coolest of kids flew at his target with ridiculous grace, the kind of smoothness that shouldn't even be real, just didn't happen.

"when you contacted him," said Aradia, quietly, sadly, "you created the one branching point in the timeline. he had time before she arrived. in our art, that means everything."

"M8ke some fucking sense, douche8ag!!!!!!!!" Vriska screamed; she wasn't going down without a fight, Terezi could hear the clink of her dice coming out. But that wasn't going to help her, not this time.

"he couldnt go back, not without changing the events that caused you to contact him in the first place. like i said, that form of paradox isnt permitted anymore. and by the time of the decision point, it was too late."

"Bluh, bluh, bored now," said Dave, masked by the blue-- he'd flipped behind her, now. Earth's sky could be that shade of blue, sometimes, Terezi thought, somehow not paying proper attention to the moment; she didn't know why. Earth's sky could be that shade of blue, and Vriska had taken it as a sign.

> **I do wonder if there will be any trouble with extra-universal property rights. Though, the trolls' session's "Earth" is probably gone now. Or is it...? Just what did the trolls' session create?**
> 
>  **...“Oh yes. I could get into the geometries of it, the mechanics of isoparthenogenetic n-dimensional rotations and so on, but then I’d need _three_ aspirins, and my stomach’ll get upset."**
> 
>  **/obscurequote**

"but he could go forward, which made his escape just about inevitable. this allowed his future timeline to come back and affect the past, starting at that decision point."

"8ored?" Vriska echoed, in her most dangerous hiss. "Well, let's see what we can to to entertain you!!!!!!!!"

Sky flared, fire feinted, metal screeched on stone. "Let's t8ke this outside, motherfucker!!!!!!!! Killing you again will be the 8est fun I have all week!!!!!!!!!"

"Shit, allow me," said Dave, and the plate-glass window shattered. There was a tree that direction, Terezi remembered, huge by Earth standards, tall enough; how considerate, she wouldn't have to lug the body far.

"so his future self appeared, one who had killed vriska already," Aradia continued. She might not be as emotionless as her robot used to be, but she was just as implacable sometimes; Terezi wished she would just shut up. "even her loaded dice fail, and hes hardly a novice at the art of war; there had to be timelines in which he would, and nothing could stop him from coming back. besides... loops are still permissible."

> **Aradia as Maid of Exposition. Weren't really many other options, though. No one else could know. Kind o pushing it that even she does.**

"WHAT THE FUCK, SO WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU SAYING, DAMN IT?" Karkat demanded; she didn't know how he wasn't getting it. It all seemed devastatingly simple to her; she should've figured it out ages ago. "THIS GODDAMN TIME BULLSHIT GIVES ME A HEADACHE. SPIT IT OUT ALREADY!"

"its just like he said," she said, sounding terribly sad, as sad as Terezi had ever heard her, just about the way Terezi felt herself. "she killed him. but she killed him after he had already killed her. she can't escape it now. luck means nothing. she cant survive without causing a paradox."

> **Luck should be a hell of a power. Nearly unbeatable without tricks like this.**
> 
>  **Of course, you've got to be paying attention, and luck is fickle, and you have to want to win.**

"1T M34NS H3'S GO1NG TO K1LL H3R," she said raspily, staring out the window; she was moving toward it, though she didn't know why she bothered.

"BUT THAT'S CHEA--"

"H3'S GO1NG TO K1LL H3R, 4ND TH3N H3'S GO1NG TO GO B4CK SO SH3 C4N K1LL H1M."

Karkat was stunned into silence; Aradia bowed her head, and she thought she might have caught the scent of tears. Kanaya gasped, Tavros sobbed, Feferi quietly cried out, and Sollux didn't say anything at all. Terezi didn't care; she was pressed against the windowsill, absentmindedly knocking shards of glass out into the courtyard.

God, but he was beautiful in motion like this. There was some grace to troll battle-styles, to be sure, but overall it was a rare quality compared to pure cutthroat brutality. And there was a harsh edge to him, to be sure, that left his style not totally removed from an Alternian, but still, he fucking _danced_. Every move flowed with a smooth certainty, hit or miss, a graceful flourish that could've been born of self-conscious dignity or simply could've been natural to the boy.

> **I notice I get more, descriptive here. Can say that Terezi is paying special attention, now; but this is the dramatic climax, so of course that is the real reason.**
> 
>  **Imagery isn't strictly _hard_ for me, not usually; but it's always a second thought, takes a moment for me to shift mental gears into it, and I'm not always very confident about it. Dialogue, heaven help me, I can rattle off for ages once I start, the question it knowing how to stop; plotting is fun, both the short ones that you understand from the beginning, and the long ones that keep shifting in the light, showing different facets as you write. Imagery, though-- this is a product of how I think; I don't see stories very clearly, I usually have to put some effort in to picture it. Mostly I-- hear them, I suppose.**

A fair fight, this time, and fuck Vriska's luck, fuck time shenanigans, Terezi believed he would've won it no matter what. He was dancing rings around her, dodging 3/4 of her attacks-- they were talking, but she couldn't make out most of the words, not from this far. "What did you tell him?" she thought she heard. "How did you explain that you were going back on every fucking word you ever said?"

She spat something back-- 8lood, pathetic, what it took to survive, and swung, knocking him back, but only for a moment.

> **I did more to explain it this time than the last. "More" does not necessarily mean "enough". But I have a pretty high tolerance for vagueness. "There is an explanation, something to do with that, but more importantly this is what it means" is okay with me. This is not a universal preference. XD**

Another feint, and then he was behind her, and his sword slipped into her back. He was saying something, she knew he was saying something, but she still couldn't make it out; she thought she might've heard her whisper something in reply before he let her go, jerking the sword back roughly, letting her crumple to the ground.

He turned around, and looked at her; one of her hands gripped the windowsill tight, while the other slowly raised her phone.

GC: DON'T GO.

He raised a hand to his shades, let it drop down again, his shoulders sagging, his blade still at the ready.

TG: come on rez  
TG: what am i supposed to do stay here till im 80  
TG: thatd fill the time loop just fine  
TG: what do you mean whats wrong with me vriska my back just hurts and i dyed my hair white and im wearing a mask  
TG: its a human welcome home thing  
TG: you gonna stab me or not  
TG: not gonna work  
TG: shit im hitting fucking puberty i grew two inches in the last month  
TG: im lucky if i got another month before im michael jordan  
TG: except whiter and more badass  
TG: well okay there was space jam  
TG: john loved that piece of shit movie  
TG: fucking cartoon characters and chaos dunks  
TG: is there a troll michael jordan

She shook her head; her hands were shaking.

GC: DON'T GO.

> **He deflects. She isn't fazed for half a moment. It really is an interesting pairing.**

TG: aw fuck  
TG: see this is why i didnt tell you  
TG: if you had time to prepare you mightve locked me in the fucking dungeon or something  
TG: fuck time and space youd knock me over the head and sit on me  
TG: chain me to a bed and make me lay down sick beats  
TG: misery except with less kathy bates and more dope rhymes  
TG: is there a troll kathy bates  
TG: ...ok of course youre not going to answer that  
TG: its a stupid question and im just talking like a fucking moron because  
TG: im still scared   


> **Does it mean less, how they talk, when he's got no one else to talk to in the world? When there's no time left for repercussions?**
> 
>  **Or is fear still an extraordinary thing for him to admit?**

  
TG: but heres the thing  
TG: aradia told me once  
TG: or maybe a lot of times technically look english doesnt really work with our gig  
TG: doesnt matter when or where or how many times  
TG: point is she told me that with our gig  
TG: weve gotta learn to deal with dying  
TG: because were gonna do it a lot  
TG: and holy shit did we  
TG: again and again and again and again and in a way im still not really okay with that  
TG: but more like it was bullshit that it had to be that way at all   


> **Eventually I wrote a fic about that conversation, that's how many ~issues~ I have with it.**

  
TG: it took me a long time  
TG: which luckily i had of course ha ha  
TG: but finally i figured out  
TG: theres shit im okay with dying for  
TG: of course i died for a lot of pointless shit too and that kind of bugged me  
TG: but some things  
TG: some things are worth it  
TG: if i couldve killed myself to save them i wouldnt even blink anymore  
TG: even knowing this is my last chance  
TG: no more spare daves exploring the mysteries of space and time in death bubbles or whatever  
TG: but even if i cant save them  
TG: im fixing a lot of other shit here i know it for sure  
TG: ive been doing more than chasing after wizards and juggalos and pirates youll see  
TG: youre gonna be okay  
TG: and earths gonna be okay  
TG: and im gonna be okay really  
TG: not that it even really matters  
TG: this is how its got to be  
TG: is this making any goddamn sense at all

It did, of course, that was the whole fucking problem, but she wasn't going to tell him that.

GC: pl34s3.  
GC: st4y.   
TG: oh for fucks sake  
TG: i fucking cant   
GC: 1 know  
GC: 1 just  
GC: 1t's not f41r  
GC: 1t's not just  
GC: 1t n3v3r should h4v3 h4pp3n3d  
GC: 4nd you shouldn't h4v3 to do th1s.  
GC: 4nd 1t's not your f4ult 4nd th3r3's noth1ng you c4n do 4nd th1s 1s prob4bly just m4k1ng 3v3ryth1ng 3v3n worse  
GC: 4nd 1'm sorry for th4t but  
GC: 1t hurts  
GC: 1t shouldn't but 1t do3s   


> **Story of the Homestuck universe, imho.**

  
TG: yeah i know  
TG: hey look at it this way  
TG: maybe ive fucked up and youll be first against the wall when the revolution comes   
GC: h3h3  
GC: not 4 fuck1ng ch4nc3    
TG: still we all gotta go sometime  
TG: so how about you set things straight in this shithole  
TG: and me and my thousand dead selves will treat you to some ill beats when youre done   


> **Continuing the "let's wonder about weird philosophical shit" trend... what is the Homestuck afterlife? We've conclusive evidence of life after death, quite incontrovertible, but predicated so far on dream-bubbles, apparently specially arranged. What lies outside of them? What happened to the dead before, what will happen after, what happens to the untold dead who were never in the game? Do they wander in the void with the Horrorterrors? Or do they drift elsewhere?**
> 
>  **For that matter, just how deeply are SBurb mechanics integrated in the world at large? Do powers granted during the game persist in the "normal" universe? Does this only apply in universes created by the game? bluh bluh...**

  
GC: 1t's 4 dat3. >:]   
TG: ready to kick some ass then   
GC: YOU'D B3TT3R B3L13V3 1T, COOLK1D.   
TG: oh i do  
TG: thanks for everything you crazy bitch   
GC: >:]  
GC: S4M3 TO YOU, YOU 1NSUFF3R4BL3 PR1CK.   
TG: heh  
TG: see you on the flip side terezi   
GC: GOODBY3, D4V3.

It was a lie, of course; she was an accomplished liar. She wasn't okay with this at all. She was still hurt and scared and fucking furious, but what good would come of telling him that? It wouldn't stop him, it wouldn't change anything. It was all already decided and she didn't have a say at all.

> **And there's not a lot she hates more than not having a say.**

But it was fucking _brave_. He drew his timetables from his sylladex with practiced ease, honey-smooth, even now; and he went to meet his death, with what was very nearly a fucking pirouette.

Cherry and iron and ash; there was silence, still, behind her.

Just one death. Not even a troll. This was nothing by Alternian standards. It shouldn't be doing this to her.

...But that was philosophy, and Terezi was nothing if not practical.

She felt Karkat step closer behind her; he probably meant well, but she didn't care right now, couldn't cope, so she jumped over the windowsill, rope in hand. The last duty of the legislacerator: to make certain of the criminal's death.

It wasn't justice. It never had been; she understood that now.

But it was going to be.

> **Justice, and the Law, and the Justice System: these are three things, that we can only hope are actually somewhat congruent. Terezi would probably have been a fantastic legislacerator, savaging whatever she was pointed at by societal prejudices or superiors or her own preferences. She has a pure, sometimes debilitating focus, a dedication to systems over people, and a mind that can twist words, situations, other people into nearly anything she wants.**
> 
>  **The trouble is, like her ancestor, she has a heart that can be swayed, and she is dedicated to Justice more than the law; and if ever she realizes that the two are opposing things, all of those tools and knives and teeth are going to be turned on the ones who think she's on their leash. And then there's gonna be trouble.**
> 
>  **...Homestuck brings out the revolutionary feminist in me. Though it doesn't have all that far to dig.**
> 
>  **So basically this is a story about weird time shit and Terezi developing into the architect of a new world order. Which is how I stumbled across the title, I guess (that is nearly always one of the hardest parts for me..), and the point of all the verse about Legislacerators, which Terezi upholds, and subverts, and upholds by subverting, and subverts by upholding.**
> 
>  **Terezi is goddamn complicated. But I like her anyway.**

> FGC: W3'R3 GROWN UP NOW, YOU S33. 4ND 1T'S OUR TURN TO D3C1D3 WH4T "JUST1C3" M34NS.

\--

 _if crimes you've committed  
enjoy what you're given  
for no one escapes them  
their shadow will fall.  
sooner or later  
legislacerators  
bring death to the guilty  
and justice for all._

-*-


End file.
